i'm worn out.
so very worn out.
i tried to do my best at first.
but then it all seem so unneccessary.
because the eventual result will still be the same.
nobody cares.
i tried to but it never seem to work.
so now i decided to slacken.
but external pressure pushes me on.
i don't like it this way.
sometimes i don't understand why is it that there are some things that i can sacrifice and others can't.
it's all the same.
to do well in one aspect u'll definitely have to sacrifice another.
that's the rule that applies to all of us.
it's a fact.
i've already sacrifice my school work, my results and most importantly, i've sacrificed time spent with my family.
[tears]
life has never been smooth-sailing eversince i stepped into the gates of Meridian
[why?]
feel so alone, so empty.
who is to understand what i'm feeling right now?

***

my family's waiting...
but now they wait no more.
they left me in this empty shell
to fend for myself,
i don't blame them.
i blame it on myself
for having taken on so many responsibilities.
why can't i be a normal kid?
i feel so alone.
this lonely figure that has overshadowed me.
i feel so helpless.
nobody there to lend a helping hand.
i feel so ignorant.
so naive, so childish for having let my tears rolled.
i feel...so neglected, so condemned
i feel so hated, not by others, but by myself.
[...screams...]