hi...
if anyone is wondering where i had gone...
i was actually busy working and spending the money that i had worked so hard for away.
bought a top(tank top w a gingerbread man).
bought a bag(puma---again!!).
bought another top but is sort of long n is purple.
bought a bubble skirt n leggings(or was it leggies??) to go w the skirt.
searching for my new shoes.
resorted to having to go online shopping now.
***
how to be a shoppaholic...
LESSON 1:
-shop til ur feet kills u n til they swell up to 1 size larger than ur usual shoe size.
for that u wld have succeeded in making sure that u dont miss a sopt in the mall u're in.
LESSON 2:
-dont ever(i mean NEVER!!) buy something that u fancy in the 1st shop u enter.
if u r some1 lidat. i'm sorry but u've failed to b a shoppaholic.
LESSON 3:
-always shop as if the cash in ur pocket never ends. =)
that wld have been an excellent way to make up to urself for the past yrs good behaviour.
so dont be shy!! pick up ur wallet/purse today n shop away like there's no tomorrow!!
Monday, December 25, 2006
Sunday, December 10, 2006
now working, so my life currently revolves ard ntuc.
wahaha.
must admit that i m a person who is stingy with my smiles.
com'on la!! not as if smiling will kill me.
but i thot i smiled quite a lot today.
dont know why. =.=
well it's a good thing rite??
***
haha but anyway, here i m w all my complaints of the week.
ntuc is definitely not a place for ppl who r afraid of heights.
i was supposed to be a cashier but i owaes get called away to do random jobs.
i m the cashier+storehand+admin worker
hehex. storehand is one who unpacks the goods and place them on the shelves.
n is definitely not a job for those who have a phobia of heights.
so my supervisor asked me to get a ladder to climb to the top shelf to bring the boxes down.
i totally freaked out.
there were 4 steps on the ladder, i was on the 1st 1 n i felt like a mile away from the grd.
[lol exaggeration]
but it reli feels scary. haha.
something tt i wld like to suggest wld b placing the counters further into the store.
bcos...the air-conditioning is right above my head.
it blows...continously. if i switched it off. i wld feel like a roasting pig.
so my hair gets messy. =.=
the air keeps blowing at max rate n my hair becomes flat.
[ugly sai]
n i dun get insured for messy hair.
in fact i dun get insured for anything tt i risked to do at ntuc. lol.
not even climbing to the top shelf on the unreliable-looking ladder. :x
***
hmm...wad i m abt to say is not fabricated nor is it my personal opinion.
there has been ppl who kept telling me i look like certain ppl.
the most common ones are:
-olinda cho, from last season's Singapore Idol.
[omg do i seriously look like her?? other than the short hair i seriously dun think we have anything else in common, as in facially. Shud i b feeling flattered now?? XD]
-???, sorry cant rmb the name but she was the 1 who won the 2nd gold medal in the DOHA games for sg. she's the 50m butterfly style swimmer. considering tt sg only won 3 gold medals, it is a big acheivement. =)
[hmm...kk so all short hair women look like me. =.= thx for the compliment. but i'm not as good a swimmer as she is. lol. i'm flattered.]
disclaimer: i didn't say tt i actually look like them. but ppl whom i m exposed to, said i looked like them. ??!!
wahaha.
must admit that i m a person who is stingy with my smiles.
com'on la!! not as if smiling will kill me.
but i thot i smiled quite a lot today.
dont know why. =.=
well it's a good thing rite??
***
haha but anyway, here i m w all my complaints of the week.
ntuc is definitely not a place for ppl who r afraid of heights.
i was supposed to be a cashier but i owaes get called away to do random jobs.
i m the cashier+storehand+admin worker
hehex. storehand is one who unpacks the goods and place them on the shelves.
n is definitely not a job for those who have a phobia of heights.
so my supervisor asked me to get a ladder to climb to the top shelf to bring the boxes down.
i totally freaked out.
there were 4 steps on the ladder, i was on the 1st 1 n i felt like a mile away from the grd.
[lol exaggeration]
but it reli feels scary. haha.
something tt i wld like to suggest wld b placing the counters further into the store.
bcos...the air-conditioning is right above my head.
it blows...continously. if i switched it off. i wld feel like a roasting pig.
so my hair gets messy. =.=
the air keeps blowing at max rate n my hair becomes flat.
[ugly sai]
n i dun get insured for messy hair.
in fact i dun get insured for anything tt i risked to do at ntuc. lol.
not even climbing to the top shelf on the unreliable-looking ladder. :x
***
hmm...wad i m abt to say is not fabricated nor is it my personal opinion.
there has been ppl who kept telling me i look like certain ppl.
the most common ones are:
-olinda cho, from last season's Singapore Idol.
[omg do i seriously look like her?? other than the short hair i seriously dun think we have anything else in common, as in facially. Shud i b feeling flattered now?? XD]
-???, sorry cant rmb the name but she was the 1 who won the 2nd gold medal in the DOHA games for sg. she's the 50m butterfly style swimmer. considering tt sg only won 3 gold medals, it is a big acheivement. =)
[hmm...kk so all short hair women look like me. =.= thx for the compliment. but i'm not as good a swimmer as she is. lol. i'm flattered.]
disclaimer: i didn't say tt i actually look like them. but ppl whom i m exposed to, said i looked like them. ??!!
Tuesday, December 5, 2006
hoi...
calling out to all good ppl out there.
those who crave to have retail therapy but r too broke to do anything abt it.
pls...heed my advice.
[work for it]
as in literally.
cash dont come falling from skies
or grow from trees,
and money definitely dont keep flowing from ur parents' wallets.
cos they worked equally hard for it.
***
today is officially my 3rd day of work.
working as a cashier as ntuc agn.
not tt i wan to.
but...[nvm]
my boss told me yday.
***
[convo w boss]
boss: u nxt yr 2nd yr rite?
boss: aft tt go uni got v long break hor?
boss: uni april then start lessons rite?
me: (nods)
boss: then when u a lev finish u come back here n work la! (all smiles)
me: (raise eyebrows. stunned)
me: err...orh. (too shocked for words)
***
not tt i'm flattered but i just din wan to work at ntuc anymore.
lol. pay is lousy n i have to put on the 'all-smiles' face to those disgusting customers.
i have to follow the GST rule
which meant Greet Smile Thankyou.
although i do admit tt my supervisors n colleages were v nice to me.
but just the thot of having to smile at ppl whom u reli feel like slapping makes me uneasy.
as least if i worked as a data entry clerk i wldnt have to feel so uncomfortable.
as least the computer wun grumble or even talk back at me.
at most the only way of showing displeasure wld be tt it hang on me.
but i wldnt mind tt.
haha.
***
just 3days of work n i'm facing hell loads of problems.
i dont know which is worst?
1. 9 voids in 3days, which will leave a bad record even tho it is clearly not my fault
or
2. a man who is a do-do head, comes round asking for discounts on a non-discounted item. eventually leaving me with 1 void receipt. (clearly the dettol handwash500ml cost $4.90, a newspaper cutting showed that 2 for $5.15 and tt is for the 400ml 1 which our branch does not carry. so he came to me w 2 btles of 500ml handwash and asked for the $5.15 price. even a retard wld noe that it wldnt have been so cheap. when 1 is like alr $4.90!! how can u expect 2 to be only a freaking cheap $5.15??! [flabbergasted] unless the handwash is some brandless shit n is near its expiry n when u use it only 1% of the bacteria gets killed. only then wld 2 btles of handwash cost some cheap!! RETARD)
or
3. an old man who comes in w a cigarette in hand (me being v sensitive to cigarette smoke, immediately told him politely that tis was a non-smoking area). the old man who was clearly in the wrg stil reasoned w me. =.= he was even trying to hide the cigarette behind him while queueing. but my highly-sensitive nose detected the smoke, which was so choking!! i told him tt he was not allowed to smoke here but he told that he came to pay for the bread n smoking was a diff issue. come-on la mister!! who u trying to kid sia?? obviously it was a diff matter n he was not allowed to bring a lighted stinking stick into tis vicinity. but wadeva. cldnt be bothered to reason w him too much. so i hurriedly scanned his item, cash out n he went off, ntuc bag in 1 hand, cigarette in another.
or
4. met a mad woman who was got pissed for no rhyme or reason. -.- well...it went like tt...tis angmoh-speaking chinese woman came to the counter w 5 btles of carbonated water, then she said she wanted 6 so she went off to get another btle. me, being a v nice n professional cashier did not wan to let the rest of the queue wait so i did the nxt person 1st. then the woman came back w her 6th btle of carbo water she saw tt i let the nxt person go 1st so she got pissed. she slammed the btle on the counter table n she scolded 'shit'. she folded her arms n was looking v bad. when it was her turn she was v displeased w me. it wasnt my attitude tt made her blew her top. it was her problem. tt's y i dun like working in the service line. cos no matter how a costomer scold u or even if u noe tt obviously it wasnt my fault u still have to GST(Greet Smile Thankyou). she threw the money at the table n waited while i scanned her items. i almost punched n screamed at her. but i tolerated. bcos if i had cont w my positive attitude, other costomers wld have regarded her as a siao cha bo(mad woman in hokkien) n i wld be the nice n polite cashier. so i just cont n then she left. wad a biatch.
***
sometimes some costomers r just annoying.
they get cocky when they have a bit of money.
pls la.
ben siao jie bu shi qiong de lor. (it means tt i m not poor in chi)
i'm a rich man's kid. lol. jkjk.
haha as in not poor enuf to be so desparate for the cashier job.
i m not obliged to work there. only bcos my supervisor asked me back.
so here i m! stuck.
at 1st i worked there cos i thot it wld be nice to earn my 1st dollar all by myself.
haha. it feels good to have cash in ur pocket.
but during last yr chi new yr(peak period), i had a v bad experience which made me cry.
haha. so when the mad woman came to me, i thot "sian it's de'javu".
nvm. i will be there for 1mth only. till the end of dec. =)
haa. i will not be short of cash during nxt yr. yeah. hurrays.
***
will be posting my pics taken in south afica v soon. :)
calling out to all good ppl out there.
those who crave to have retail therapy but r too broke to do anything abt it.
pls...heed my advice.
[work for it]
as in literally.
cash dont come falling from skies
or grow from trees,
and money definitely dont keep flowing from ur parents' wallets.
cos they worked equally hard for it.
***
today is officially my 3rd day of work.
working as a cashier as ntuc agn.
not tt i wan to.
but...[nvm]
my boss told me yday.
***
[convo w boss]
boss: u nxt yr 2nd yr rite?
boss: aft tt go uni got v long break hor?
boss: uni april then start lessons rite?
me: (nods)
boss: then when u a lev finish u come back here n work la! (all smiles)
me: (raise eyebrows. stunned)
me: err...orh. (too shocked for words)
***
not tt i'm flattered but i just din wan to work at ntuc anymore.
lol. pay is lousy n i have to put on the 'all-smiles' face to those disgusting customers.
i have to follow the GST rule
which meant Greet Smile Thankyou.
although i do admit tt my supervisors n colleages were v nice to me.
but just the thot of having to smile at ppl whom u reli feel like slapping makes me uneasy.
as least if i worked as a data entry clerk i wldnt have to feel so uncomfortable.
as least the computer wun grumble or even talk back at me.
at most the only way of showing displeasure wld be tt it hang on me.
but i wldnt mind tt.
haha.
***
just 3days of work n i'm facing hell loads of problems.
i dont know which is worst?
1. 9 voids in 3days, which will leave a bad record even tho it is clearly not my fault
or
2. a man who is a do-do head, comes round asking for discounts on a non-discounted item. eventually leaving me with 1 void receipt. (clearly the dettol handwash500ml cost $4.90, a newspaper cutting showed that 2 for $5.15 and tt is for the 400ml 1 which our branch does not carry. so he came to me w 2 btles of 500ml handwash and asked for the $5.15 price. even a retard wld noe that it wldnt have been so cheap. when 1 is like alr $4.90!! how can u expect 2 to be only a freaking cheap $5.15??! [flabbergasted] unless the handwash is some brandless shit n is near its expiry n when u use it only 1% of the bacteria gets killed. only then wld 2 btles of handwash cost some cheap!! RETARD)
or
3. an old man who comes in w a cigarette in hand (me being v sensitive to cigarette smoke, immediately told him politely that tis was a non-smoking area). the old man who was clearly in the wrg stil reasoned w me. =.= he was even trying to hide the cigarette behind him while queueing. but my highly-sensitive nose detected the smoke, which was so choking!! i told him tt he was not allowed to smoke here but he told that he came to pay for the bread n smoking was a diff issue. come-on la mister!! who u trying to kid sia?? obviously it was a diff matter n he was not allowed to bring a lighted stinking stick into tis vicinity. but wadeva. cldnt be bothered to reason w him too much. so i hurriedly scanned his item, cash out n he went off, ntuc bag in 1 hand, cigarette in another.
or
4. met a mad woman who was got pissed for no rhyme or reason. -.- well...it went like tt...tis angmoh-speaking chinese woman came to the counter w 5 btles of carbonated water, then she said she wanted 6 so she went off to get another btle. me, being a v nice n professional cashier did not wan to let the rest of the queue wait so i did the nxt person 1st. then the woman came back w her 6th btle of carbo water she saw tt i let the nxt person go 1st so she got pissed. she slammed the btle on the counter table n she scolded 'shit'. she folded her arms n was looking v bad. when it was her turn she was v displeased w me. it wasnt my attitude tt made her blew her top. it was her problem. tt's y i dun like working in the service line. cos no matter how a costomer scold u or even if u noe tt obviously it wasnt my fault u still have to GST(Greet Smile Thankyou). she threw the money at the table n waited while i scanned her items. i almost punched n screamed at her. but i tolerated. bcos if i had cont w my positive attitude, other costomers wld have regarded her as a siao cha bo(mad woman in hokkien) n i wld be the nice n polite cashier. so i just cont n then she left. wad a biatch.
***
sometimes some costomers r just annoying.
they get cocky when they have a bit of money.
pls la.
ben siao jie bu shi qiong de lor. (it means tt i m not poor in chi)
i'm a rich man's kid. lol. jkjk.
haha as in not poor enuf to be so desparate for the cashier job.
i m not obliged to work there. only bcos my supervisor asked me back.
so here i m! stuck.
at 1st i worked there cos i thot it wld be nice to earn my 1st dollar all by myself.
haha. it feels good to have cash in ur pocket.
but during last yr chi new yr(peak period), i had a v bad experience which made me cry.
haha. so when the mad woman came to me, i thot "sian it's de'javu".
nvm. i will be there for 1mth only. till the end of dec. =)
haa. i will not be short of cash during nxt yr. yeah. hurrays.
***
will be posting my pics taken in south afica v soon. :)
Wednesday, November 22, 2006
Tuesday, November 21, 2006
Saturday, November 18, 2006
Thursday, November 16, 2006
bought a new phone~
sony ericsson K618i
griefing over the lost of my precious siemens phone.
boos.
it died on me.
didnt lose it.
the screen merely spoilt.
cant c a single thing.
the whole screen was fuzzy.
so i had to get a new one.
argh!!
my contacts r still in tt phone.
cant get them out since the screen is gone.
fixing it wld cost nearly $100 or even more.
[not worth]
boo-hoo.
pls ppl...leave ur contacts on my tagboard so i can update my phonebook.
thank you~
=)
sony ericsson K618i
griefing over the lost of my precious siemens phone.
boos.
it died on me.
didnt lose it.
the screen merely spoilt.
cant c a single thing.
the whole screen was fuzzy.
so i had to get a new one.
argh!!
my contacts r still in tt phone.
cant get them out since the screen is gone.
fixing it wld cost nearly $100 or even more.
[not worth]
boo-hoo.
pls ppl...leave ur contacts on my tagboard so i can update my phonebook.
thank you~
=)
Wednesday, November 8, 2006
at last, i manage to get what the last sentence in 'KingKong' was saying.
"it wasnt the planes that killed the beast, it was beauty that killed the beast."
sad to say, but it was true. *sobs*
my mum was like telling me that since i pity Kong so much,
she might as well marry me off to a gorilla when we go to south africa.
[going there at the end of the yr!! =)]
ha-ha. not funny. =.=
btw, the type of gorilla featured in the film was a silverback.
not something that i crapped up but the name of that species is really silverback.
it is the biggest ape in the monkey family.
lol. i'm being so random here.
***
having a headache n a sore throat.
wish me luck for op tml. =)
i worked reli hard for pw. [serious]
i'm stil shocked as to y i m not exactly falling sick yet.
[i mean not sick enough to visit the doctor]
*splitting headache*
"it wasnt the planes that killed the beast, it was beauty that killed the beast."
sad to say, but it was true. *sobs*
my mum was like telling me that since i pity Kong so much,
she might as well marry me off to a gorilla when we go to south africa.
[going there at the end of the yr!! =)]
ha-ha. not funny. =.=
btw, the type of gorilla featured in the film was a silverback.
not something that i crapped up but the name of that species is really silverback.
it is the biggest ape in the monkey family.
lol. i'm being so random here.
***
having a headache n a sore throat.
wish me luck for op tml. =)
i worked reli hard for pw. [serious]
i'm stil shocked as to y i m not exactly falling sick yet.
[i mean not sick enough to visit the doctor]
*splitting headache*
Sunday, November 5, 2006
Anybody watched 'King Kong' yet?
i believe it was on the big screens sometime ago.
just watched a rented vcd.
gosh...
i just let my tear glands worked.
it was so heart-wretching.
it was a menace.
not Kong but the humans.
the movie showed how terrible humans were.
turning against everything for their own greedy gains.
n money was the ignition point of the whole event.
betrayal of friends in order to continue the pursuit for fame and fortune.
there was this last sentence which i cldn't quite catch.
but it was something like, "Kong did not die from the guns, he died because..."
didnt catch the last part.
but it's ok.
i m going to watch it a 2nd time on tue.
haa. n nobody's gonna stop me.
lol. there was a little humour in the movie but stil a sad movie. ):
[stop animal abuse!!]--random
***
went out yday w ser, karen n jx(long time no c!!)
it was quite a rush cause we met at 2pm n left at abt 7pm.
went to this fashion agn n also shopped at city plaza.
had to 'dig' to find good n cheap wear.
karen spent the most. ($50 i tink)
i bought another top for $10 at city plaza. =)
stil cldnt get a bottom.
i tink i might just cut up any pair of my jeans.
lol. (oops)
it was a pity we had reli little time at city plaza cause it was a wholesale centre for clothes and those smart boutique owners jacked up the price purposely so ppl like us wldnt go flocking down to their place and buy clothes.
saw tis brown top, reli pretty. hmm...dont know how to describe it.
shud have taken a photo of it.
but i stil bought another top anyway.
it was green stripes.
bought a silver belt to complement it today. =)
***
wee~
i guess i'm ALMOST done for my new year shopping.
no lack of clothes during new year!
yay ;)
i believe it was on the big screens sometime ago.
just watched a rented vcd.
gosh...
i just let my tear glands worked.
it was so heart-wretching.
it was a menace.
not Kong but the humans.
the movie showed how terrible humans were.
turning against everything for their own greedy gains.
n money was the ignition point of the whole event.
betrayal of friends in order to continue the pursuit for fame and fortune.
there was this last sentence which i cldn't quite catch.
but it was something like, "Kong did not die from the guns, he died because..."
didnt catch the last part.
but it's ok.
i m going to watch it a 2nd time on tue.
haa. n nobody's gonna stop me.
lol. there was a little humour in the movie but stil a sad movie. ):
[stop animal abuse!!]--random
***
went out yday w ser, karen n jx(long time no c!!)
it was quite a rush cause we met at 2pm n left at abt 7pm.
went to this fashion agn n also shopped at city plaza.
had to 'dig' to find good n cheap wear.
karen spent the most. ($50 i tink)
i bought another top for $10 at city plaza. =)
stil cldnt get a bottom.
i tink i might just cut up any pair of my jeans.
lol. (oops)
it was a pity we had reli little time at city plaza cause it was a wholesale centre for clothes and those smart boutique owners jacked up the price purposely so ppl like us wldnt go flocking down to their place and buy clothes.
saw tis brown top, reli pretty. hmm...dont know how to describe it.
shud have taken a photo of it.
but i stil bought another top anyway.
it was green stripes.
bought a silver belt to complement it today. =)
***
wee~
i guess i'm ALMOST done for my new year shopping.
no lack of clothes during new year!
yay ;)
Thursday, November 2, 2006
have been going on a shopping spree.
bought quite some stuff recetly.
so i have decided to b gracious and share my find w evry1.
=)
my 1st find was when i went to queensway shopping mall w ser.
tis is wad i bought...
side chain no.1
***
side chain no.2
tis 1 looks pretty on skirts. [pearls :D]
***
these are some of my more recent finds.
i believe i have blog abt it b4.
abt going to tis fashion w yz.
bought a top n a skirt.
ta-dah!
pretty gold prints. =)
***
the skirt (front)...wee~
(back)
***
tis is a v random find frm a shop[not sure where]
went w my mum.
bought tis top.
(words on top: american eagle)
lols dun ask me why.
***
there's a night bazaar near my hse n i bought caps n badanas.
the black cap is mine n the other my bro's.
bought badanas for him n myself.
mine's white. =)
***
the caps...(mine)
(my bro's)
***
then there was this scotchtape w cute designs for 1buck.
n tis is super random.
needed a torchlight for OBS camp at the end of the yr.
so i bought a pink torchlight for only $1.50 so even if i lose it i wun feel the pinch. hehe.
bought clips as well from the night bazaar.
***
ooh...n i got tis bag from a magazine.
it's a freebie but i thot it look kinda nice.
***
going to get a job soon.
went to 'recruit express' but i was hoping for a more stable job rather than assignments.
anw i will b working n i will have more MONEH to spend. =x
nono i shall save up.
[pat on me shoulder]
i have not spend all the money tt i earned last hols when i worked at NTUC as a cashier.
;)
cheerios.
n ku-dos to my lovely merchandise.
bought quite some stuff recetly.
so i have decided to b gracious and share my find w evry1.
=)
my 1st find was when i went to queensway shopping mall w ser.
tis is wad i bought...
side chain no.1
***
side chain no.2
tis 1 looks pretty on skirts. [pearls :D]
***
these are some of my more recent finds.
i believe i have blog abt it b4.
abt going to tis fashion w yz.
bought a top n a skirt.
ta-dah!
pretty gold prints. =)
***
the skirt (front)...wee~
(back)
***
tis is a v random find frm a shop[not sure where]
went w my mum.
bought tis top.
(words on top: american eagle)
lols dun ask me why.
***
there's a night bazaar near my hse n i bought caps n badanas.
the black cap is mine n the other my bro's.
bought badanas for him n myself.
mine's white. =)
***
the caps...(mine)
(my bro's)
***
then there was this scotchtape w cute designs for 1buck.
n tis is super random.
needed a torchlight for OBS camp at the end of the yr.
so i bought a pink torchlight for only $1.50 so even if i lose it i wun feel the pinch. hehe.
bought clips as well from the night bazaar.
***
ooh...n i got tis bag from a magazine.
it's a freebie but i thot it look kinda nice.
***
going to get a job soon.
went to 'recruit express' but i was hoping for a more stable job rather than assignments.
anw i will b working n i will have more MONEH to spend. =x
nono i shall save up.
[pat on me shoulder]
i have not spend all the money tt i earned last hols when i worked at NTUC as a cashier.
;)
cheerios.
n ku-dos to my lovely merchandise.
Tuesday, October 31, 2006
have been splurging on a lot of stuff lately.
bought a top n a skirt.
today i went to get a job.
it was actually a job agency so i will have to wait for tt person to contact me so i can go to work.
not v stable though.
ntuc would have been more stable but i would love to have a change of environment.
get more exp ;p
anw me, mx n ce went to heeren n took neoprints.
lol
it has been ages since i have last took any neoprints.
***
ta-dah...!!! =)
here r our neoprints. =)
[my hair looks strange cos i tied it up]
***
***
hurrays to neoprints. =)
pretty.
***
***
***
***
***
***
***
i wrote the 'ai' (love in chinese) in the last pic. pretty =)
bought a top n a skirt.
today i went to get a job.
it was actually a job agency so i will have to wait for tt person to contact me so i can go to work.
not v stable though.
ntuc would have been more stable but i would love to have a change of environment.
get more exp ;p
anw me, mx n ce went to heeren n took neoprints.
lol
it has been ages since i have last took any neoprints.
***
ta-dah...!!! =)
here r our neoprints. =)
[my hair looks strange cos i tied it up]
***
***
hurrays to neoprints. =)
pretty.
***
***
***
***
***
***
***
i wrote the 'ai' (love in chinese) in the last pic. pretty =)
Sunday, October 29, 2006
wee~
[best word to describe my emo now]
haha.
went to THIS FASHION at paya lebar with yangzi on sat.
it was a v random decision.
we stayed there for 3hrs and tried on a lot of clothes.
=)
i wanted tis purple top but then well...
it some how disappeared aft i decided to get it.
anw i got tis beige top w gold prints and...
miraculously i got a SKIRT.
[shock of my life]
haha. the skirt not bad la.
yz bought a top n a skirt as well.
lol n she was complaining tt the skirt was just not her style but she still bought it anw.
cos it was simply [cute?] skirt.
[not so much of cute but a happening skirt ;)]
lol needa slim down le, taken in too much fat ever since aft the promos.
haben been working out since.
so i met karen today.
we went swimming. [at her hse]
then we swam ten laps in an hr.
not much of an achievement but it was something.
aft which karen n her parents, plus me went to the area at my hse.
there was a night bazaar. [pasar malam]
most of the stalls were opened despite the fact that it was suppose to be a NIGHT bazaar and it was still bright and early.
bought a cap there.
quiksilver de.
looks v real though. got it for $6.50.
=)
i m happy.
[best word to describe my emo now]
haha.
went to THIS FASHION at paya lebar with yangzi on sat.
it was a v random decision.
we stayed there for 3hrs and tried on a lot of clothes.
=)
i wanted tis purple top but then well...
it some how disappeared aft i decided to get it.
anw i got tis beige top w gold prints and...
miraculously i got a SKIRT.
[shock of my life]
haha. the skirt not bad la.
yz bought a top n a skirt as well.
lol n she was complaining tt the skirt was just not her style but she still bought it anw.
cos it was simply [cute?] skirt.
[not so much of cute but a happening skirt ;)]
lol needa slim down le, taken in too much fat ever since aft the promos.
haben been working out since.
so i met karen today.
we went swimming. [at her hse]
then we swam ten laps in an hr.
not much of an achievement but it was something.
aft which karen n her parents, plus me went to the area at my hse.
there was a night bazaar. [pasar malam]
most of the stalls were opened despite the fact that it was suppose to be a NIGHT bazaar and it was still bright and early.
bought a cap there.
quiksilver de.
looks v real though. got it for $6.50.
=)
i m happy.
Friday, October 27, 2006
Wednesday, October 25, 2006
(Cloud in the above pic...cool...)
i have watched 'final fantasy 7' for the 2nd time!
this time i wasnt eyeing on the cute guys.
[ok so mayb i did a little]
but i totally understand the plot rite now.
there is this stream on Earth that gives everything its life and all.
they call it 'Lifestream'.
then one day a calamity fell on Earth, they call it Jenova.
and blah blah blah.
so there is this guy by the name of Shinra.
and he found a way to tap energy from lifestream.
and he created a bunch of SOLDIERS to stop those who tried to stop him.
so it was a complicated plot.
well u have to watch it to find out.
but i would say it was SUPERB.
then shinra injected the jenova cells into these SOLDIERS.
then there was this particular SOLDIER who was better than the rest, Sephiroth.
[all the cool names ;p]
he started to hate the world and those who created him.
well so he took revenge by wanting to take over Earth.
blah blah so there were all the monsters and stuff.
then Cloud and his friends fought through the hard times.
then those with the jenova cells had the disease called geostigma.
but eventually everybody was cured.
it was a happy ending! =)
lol
***
sorry i suck at telling stories.
but it was a good show.
considering all the cute guys and cool graphics.
the background was so real.
final fantasy rocks cos they had reli cool graphics.
for those who love animated characters and computer graphics,
this is a highly recommended show.
=)
omg i have fallen for yet another animated character, Cloud.
typical shonen with blond hair and cool haircut.
in fact practically the whole show was packed with shonens.
lol *woot*
my mum rented 'final fantasy 7'
cool show.
difficult to understand though.
so i reckoned tt i might as well drool over the cute guys rather than trying hard to understand the plot.
wee~
i m going to wake up early tml morning to watch it for the 2nd time.
wahaha.
great show.
love the cute guys. yea.
hip hip hurray for the japanese artists who have drawn such wonderful characters.
[wish: only if they can just walk right out of the tv]
haha cute guys surrounding me. =)
claps claps, i wana draw like that too.
hmm...i shall try reli hard tml to understand the plot so i can blog it n share it w everybody on how the cute guy fought with the dreaded monster.
lol.
i must be nuts.
it actually hurts me to see Cloud getting hurt by the monster. O.o
lol. then agn he was so cool when he tried to killed the monster.
he sort of 'flew' with some help.
ppl kept popping out and flinging him up towards the sky.
cool stunt. [grins]
ga-ga.
typical shonen with blond hair and cool haircut.
in fact practically the whole show was packed with shonens.
lol *woot*
my mum rented 'final fantasy 7'
cool show.
difficult to understand though.
so i reckoned tt i might as well drool over the cute guys rather than trying hard to understand the plot.
wee~
i m going to wake up early tml morning to watch it for the 2nd time.
wahaha.
great show.
love the cute guys. yea.
hip hip hurray for the japanese artists who have drawn such wonderful characters.
[wish: only if they can just walk right out of the tv]
haha cute guys surrounding me. =)
claps claps, i wana draw like that too.
hmm...i shall try reli hard tml to understand the plot so i can blog it n share it w everybody on how the cute guy fought with the dreaded monster.
lol.
i must be nuts.
it actually hurts me to see Cloud getting hurt by the monster. O.o
lol. then agn he was so cool when he tried to killed the monster.
he sort of 'flew' with some help.
ppl kept popping out and flinging him up towards the sky.
cool stunt. [grins]
ga-ga.
Monday, October 23, 2006
meridian junior college shouldnt be by that name.
i call it 'mad-ridden' junior college.
all the mugging freaks. they have all turned mad.. Yeaks!
it is totally beneath me to say that i am part of the family.
cos i m not.
i cannot picture myself in the future of that dreadful institute.
the monstrousity intimidates me.
where did my burning rock go?
[made a wish]
it has yet to come true.
so the legend of shooting stars having the ability to grant wishes have become a myth.
***
life sucks.
life never was rox-ing anyway if u lived in the 21st century.
i seriously wouldn't mind if i had a time-machine and i could go back a few decades ago.
n still be sitting by the stream catching tadpoles or digging earthworms in the fields.
life wouldn't have been much more easier but at least it will a carefree life.
bleah.
who cares anyway if u r in 'mad-ridden',
the studying epidemic had long ago infected everybody.
perhaps only me, i had the vaccine.
so it turns out that i m not infected and i became stupid.
so i would say that it is a smart disease that affected everyone.
mind you, stupidity is not contagious.
my actively-working phosphobilipid layers has successfully kept the 'mad-ridden' virus away from me.
[assuming that it is a viral disease=>incurable]
Lo and behold...i m NOT infected. so i m NOT intelligent.
pure stupidity invades me.
ah...the stupidity virus is taking over my body.
so now i m immobilised.
wadeva. byebye.
i call it 'mad-ridden' junior college.
all the mugging freaks. they have all turned mad.. Yeaks!
it is totally beneath me to say that i am part of the family.
cos i m not.
i cannot picture myself in the future of that dreadful institute.
the monstrousity intimidates me.
where did my burning rock go?
[made a wish]
it has yet to come true.
so the legend of shooting stars having the ability to grant wishes have become a myth.
***
life sucks.
life never was rox-ing anyway if u lived in the 21st century.
i seriously wouldn't mind if i had a time-machine and i could go back a few decades ago.
n still be sitting by the stream catching tadpoles or digging earthworms in the fields.
life wouldn't have been much more easier but at least it will a carefree life.
bleah.
who cares anyway if u r in 'mad-ridden',
the studying epidemic had long ago infected everybody.
perhaps only me, i had the vaccine.
so it turns out that i m not infected and i became stupid.
so i would say that it is a smart disease that affected everyone.
mind you, stupidity is not contagious.
my actively-working phosphobilipid layers has successfully kept the 'mad-ridden' virus away from me.
[assuming that it is a viral disease=>incurable]
Lo and behold...i m NOT infected. so i m NOT intelligent.
pure stupidity invades me.
ah...the stupidity virus is taking over my body.
so now i m immobilised.
wadeva. byebye.
Wednesday, October 18, 2006
hatred appears in every chapter of my book.
but vengeance does not.
as i will bring it away with me into the nether world.
***
karen--teardrop of the ocean
me--light in the night
***
[emptiness]
***
ask not my results.
ask not my feelings.
ask not my agony.
ask not my past.
ask not my present.
ask not my future.
ask not what i have.
because i have nothing.
***
someone told me that whenever we cry, our brain shrinks by 30%.
if that was true my brain would have been the size of a pea by now.
my brain cells die off faster than it could grow.
i am sorry brain.
i couldn't help it.
my head feels light n empty.
must have been the brain size.
i will not regret my decision.
i have tried.
now i know that it just wasn't the place for me.
i was never meant to be there.
i was so wrong to even think that i would excel in that place.
now i know, i am wrong.
so even if i stayed, i know my own limits.
i am sorry for feeling this way.
i am sorry for hating people who lied to me.
i wonder to myself, "why did i even bother when i was going to leave?"
today, i had the strongest urge ever to leave this wretched place.
the place that had ruined me.
the place that had taken away any hope that i ever had from me.
morale: (-ve) infinity
but vengeance does not.
as i will bring it away with me into the nether world.
***
karen--teardrop of the ocean
me--light in the night
***
[emptiness]
***
ask not my results.
ask not my feelings.
ask not my agony.
ask not my past.
ask not my present.
ask not my future.
ask not what i have.
because i have nothing.
***
someone told me that whenever we cry, our brain shrinks by 30%.
if that was true my brain would have been the size of a pea by now.
my brain cells die off faster than it could grow.
i am sorry brain.
i couldn't help it.
my head feels light n empty.
must have been the brain size.
i will not regret my decision.
i have tried.
now i know that it just wasn't the place for me.
i was never meant to be there.
i was so wrong to even think that i would excel in that place.
now i know, i am wrong.
so even if i stayed, i know my own limits.
i am sorry for feeling this way.
i am sorry for hating people who lied to me.
i wonder to myself, "why did i even bother when i was going to leave?"
today, i had the strongest urge ever to leave this wretched place.
the place that had ruined me.
the place that had taken away any hope that i ever had from me.
morale: (-ve) infinity
Friday, October 13, 2006
just read my email n my ct sent me tis.
=A SHORT STORY ON TEAMWORK=
'This is a story about a family of 4 people: Every Body, Some Body, Any Body and No Body. There was an important job to be done, and Every Body was asked to do it. Every Body was sure Some Body would do it. Any Body could have done it, but No Body did it. Some Body got angry with that, because it was Every Body's job. Every Body thought Any Body could do it, but No Body realised that Every Body wouldn't do it. In the end, Every Body blamed Some Body when No Body did what Any Body could have done.'
***
ok so the story was somewhat meaningful.
but i was more interested in my version of the story.
it is called, 'A STORY ON SOMEBODY'
'so it all begins with the family of the same 4 people(not to be elaborated). There was this important job to be done and Every Body was suppose to do it. Every Body was sure Some Body will do it and Every Body was quite right about that. Eventually Some Body did do it because Every Body wasnt doing it. No Body could be bothered. Any Body could have done it but No Body did it. so Some Body did the job and Some Body blames Every Body for a job that No Body was bothered with.'
my story is way more interesting and factual. :)
=A SHORT STORY ON TEAMWORK=
'This is a story about a family of 4 people: Every Body, Some Body, Any Body and No Body. There was an important job to be done, and Every Body was asked to do it. Every Body was sure Some Body would do it. Any Body could have done it, but No Body did it. Some Body got angry with that, because it was Every Body's job. Every Body thought Any Body could do it, but No Body realised that Every Body wouldn't do it. In the end, Every Body blamed Some Body when No Body did what Any Body could have done.'
***
ok so the story was somewhat meaningful.
but i was more interested in my version of the story.
it is called, 'A STORY ON SOMEBODY'
'so it all begins with the family of the same 4 people(not to be elaborated). There was this important job to be done and Every Body was suppose to do it. Every Body was sure Some Body will do it and Every Body was quite right about that. Eventually Some Body did do it because Every Body wasnt doing it. No Body could be bothered. Any Body could have done it but No Body did it. so Some Body did the job and Some Body blames Every Body for a job that No Body was bothered with.'
my story is way more interesting and factual. :)
now at sch...
open hse today.
feeling tired physically and mentally.
worst is that wr is still undone.
i stil have to stay up for wr tonight.
BAD news!!
darn.
sigh.
dun give excuses that you have commitments cos others have their own commitments as well.
dun tell me you r tired cos i m tired as well.
so DONT COMPLAIN.
so if the wr was sent to me before midnight,
it would have seemed early for whomever sent it.
but it's definitely late for whoever is editing it.
bloody hell dont give me the bullsit that compilation is a simple task.
COS IT IS NOT!
you do it if you think it's easy.
plus i have to do my own part n compile everyone's work.
and if you give me shit work i stay up even later to edit it.
sucks.
i have no obligations to do the compilation job.
it is not stated in any papers that a group leader must compile all the work.
so in order to save time n trouble of others, someone has to sacrifice.
dammit.
missed my anime just because i was too tired.
pw drains me. the sch drains me.
so even if nthg matters to me any more i will still have to perservere so that my incompetence wont affect others' results.
i am not going to be some stucked up, selfish freaks, who only thinks about themselves and thinking that they will be someone to cover their work for them.
listen up sucker!!
if you're not going to do it. then it is your loss.
dont blame me if your results are affected when the examiners question you.
and remember i have the ability to determine YOUR results because i can mark you down when it comes to assessment of group members.
ha. so what even you r able to assess the group leader? so what even if you r able to determine MY grades?
as if i would care.
because at least i know i've done my part n more.
n i m not going against my conscience. so dont try to give me bullshit.
i'll throw it back at your face.
in a bad mood now.
feeling tired and broke.
think i shall go work during the hols.
lol i cant believe i'm actually giving up the chance of going to south africa for the pitiful cash.
but i m pitiful and i need the cash.
~SHUT UP!
open hse today.
feeling tired physically and mentally.
worst is that wr is still undone.
i stil have to stay up for wr tonight.
BAD news!!
darn.
sigh.
dun give excuses that you have commitments cos others have their own commitments as well.
dun tell me you r tired cos i m tired as well.
so DONT COMPLAIN.
so if the wr was sent to me before midnight,
it would have seemed early for whomever sent it.
but it's definitely late for whoever is editing it.
bloody hell dont give me the bullsit that compilation is a simple task.
COS IT IS NOT!
you do it if you think it's easy.
plus i have to do my own part n compile everyone's work.
and if you give me shit work i stay up even later to edit it.
sucks.
i have no obligations to do the compilation job.
it is not stated in any papers that a group leader must compile all the work.
so in order to save time n trouble of others, someone has to sacrifice.
dammit.
missed my anime just because i was too tired.
pw drains me. the sch drains me.
so even if nthg matters to me any more i will still have to perservere so that my incompetence wont affect others' results.
i am not going to be some stucked up, selfish freaks, who only thinks about themselves and thinking that they will be someone to cover their work for them.
listen up sucker!!
if you're not going to do it. then it is your loss.
dont blame me if your results are affected when the examiners question you.
and remember i have the ability to determine YOUR results because i can mark you down when it comes to assessment of group members.
ha. so what even you r able to assess the group leader? so what even if you r able to determine MY grades?
as if i would care.
because at least i know i've done my part n more.
n i m not going against my conscience. so dont try to give me bullshit.
i'll throw it back at your face.
in a bad mood now.
feeling tired and broke.
think i shall go work during the hols.
lol i cant believe i'm actually giving up the chance of going to south africa for the pitiful cash.
but i m pitiful and i need the cash.
~SHUT UP!
BLOODY HELL!!
stayed up all night to do wr.
curse the teacher who marked my wr if he were to say it's lousy.
curse whoever did not send me their part or sent me a piece of shit work.
making me suffer like that.
did not sleep a wink.
i m one pissed and angry girl.
dont mess with me today or you r so DEAD.
man...i should go claim credits for the work done.
how frustrating.
argh.
stayed up all night to do wr.
curse the teacher who marked my wr if he were to say it's lousy.
curse whoever did not send me their part or sent me a piece of shit work.
making me suffer like that.
did not sleep a wink.
i m one pissed and angry girl.
dont mess with me today or you r so DEAD.
man...i should go claim credits for the work done.
how frustrating.
argh.
Wednesday, October 11, 2006
[now waiting for my beloved inuyasha to show on central.]
=)
***
requested love from jiaxian: ok i miss u alot la! haha
hmm...miss the silly girl. so long nvr c her.
actually ok la cos stil got go swimming together k?!!
i spouting nonsense liao.
must have been the 'having-too-much-sleep-but-stil-very-tired' syndrome.
slept like a pig ydae.
went hm, had my dinner then went to slp at 830pm.
woke up at 1130 n i found out i haben bathe. lol [stinks]
aft my shower then at 1200am i went back to slp.
haha.
in total i slpt 9hrs. [piggy*oinks*]
***
even after promos, i cant rest.
my whole life revolves around the school.
so even if there are no exams,
there are bound to be school related events that will definitely tire me out.
so now it all about pw, open hse n cca.
song bo.[v long nvr use tis phrase le]
sian dao.
***
wadeva.
i shall have happy thots.
inuyasha gonna show liao.
byebye.
HAPPY thoughts come my way...
~
=)
***
requested love from jiaxian: ok i miss u alot la! haha
hmm...miss the silly girl. so long nvr c her.
actually ok la cos stil got go swimming together k?!!
i spouting nonsense liao.
must have been the 'having-too-much-sleep-but-stil-very-tired' syndrome.
slept like a pig ydae.
went hm, had my dinner then went to slp at 830pm.
woke up at 1130 n i found out i haben bathe. lol [stinks]
aft my shower then at 1200am i went back to slp.
haha.
in total i slpt 9hrs. [piggy*oinks*]
***
even after promos, i cant rest.
my whole life revolves around the school.
so even if there are no exams,
there are bound to be school related events that will definitely tire me out.
so now it all about pw, open hse n cca.
song bo.[v long nvr use tis phrase le]
sian dao.
***
wadeva.
i shall have happy thots.
inuyasha gonna show liao.
byebye.
HAPPY thoughts come my way...
~
Monday, October 9, 2006
i have adopted 2 pets!!
wee~
**puipui--[meaning fatfat in hokkien was named after my favourite syrian hamster, passed away during june in 2004 :(]
**xiaozhu--[luozhixiang!! =) *muacks*]
ok so my day was relatively good today.
but the chem lec kinda suck cos i cldnt b bothered to pay attention anymore.
slacking my time away.
hmm...so the chem lec kinda reaffirmed my decision.
well, actually i'm stil deciding.
what's reli holding me back would be that i'm afraid that i might not adapt to the poly environment.
shuacks. i'm so indecisive.
***
an abstract from my notebook:
[something which i wrote right before the last paper]
"But i know somewhere out there, there's still people, silently, cheering me on.
It's only that deafening pain screaming within me, blocks out everything.
Everything. Even myself.
Blame it not on me for my sorrows.
Blame it not on the school.
But on my stupidity and everyone else who contributed and made it worse.
Such hypocrisy.
Seeing her smile makes me shivers.
She knows nothing about me. She knows nothing at all. She pretended she knew.
But she did not. NOTHING AT ALL.
-EMPITINESS devours ME-
***
hmm...only a short part of it.
it was kinda like a suicidal note.
only that the abstract didnt exactly featured on that particular part.
so i said, "only till the parting of a student, then will the school be aware. only then, shall the schools slows it's pace."
lol.
thou shall be the student then.
so today a few of us were randomly chatting on which spot would be the best to 'jump'.
then we kinda concluded that the parade square would be the best cos that's where all the students and teachers must gather every morning.
until that day, we will forever be remembered(feared).
then i thot of another spot.
hang ourselves in the lec halls.
lt4 would be a good choice cos most of the students are there.
but i thot that lt5 was still the best becos the light there is usually dimmer n it gives the extra creepy effect.
hahaha.
so the scenario would be that b4 anyone enters the lec hall.
hang ourselves(at the centre of the hall, from the ceiling)
then when somebody comes in n switch on the lights.
lol. they'll be scared out of their wits.
***NOTE: do not choose secluded areas of the school becos eventually the school will cordoned off the area and then we will be forgotten.
***
lol. i need help.
counselling?
nah...not exactly sucidal la.
just thot of them for fun. hehex.
wee~
**puipui--[meaning fatfat in hokkien was named after my favourite syrian hamster, passed away during june in 2004 :(]
**xiaozhu--[luozhixiang!! =) *muacks*]
ok so my day was relatively good today.
but the chem lec kinda suck cos i cldnt b bothered to pay attention anymore.
slacking my time away.
hmm...so the chem lec kinda reaffirmed my decision.
well, actually i'm stil deciding.
what's reli holding me back would be that i'm afraid that i might not adapt to the poly environment.
shuacks. i'm so indecisive.
***
an abstract from my notebook:
[something which i wrote right before the last paper]
"But i know somewhere out there, there's still people, silently, cheering me on.
It's only that deafening pain screaming within me, blocks out everything.
Everything. Even myself.
Blame it not on me for my sorrows.
Blame it not on the school.
But on my stupidity and everyone else who contributed and made it worse.
Such hypocrisy.
Seeing her smile makes me shivers.
She knows nothing about me. She knows nothing at all. She pretended she knew.
But she did not. NOTHING AT ALL.
-EMPITINESS devours ME-
***
hmm...only a short part of it.
it was kinda like a suicidal note.
only that the abstract didnt exactly featured on that particular part.
so i said, "only till the parting of a student, then will the school be aware. only then, shall the schools slows it's pace."
lol.
thou shall be the student then.
so today a few of us were randomly chatting on which spot would be the best to 'jump'.
then we kinda concluded that the parade square would be the best cos that's where all the students and teachers must gather every morning.
until that day, we will forever be remembered(feared).
then i thot of another spot.
hang ourselves in the lec halls.
lt4 would be a good choice cos most of the students are there.
but i thot that lt5 was still the best becos the light there is usually dimmer n it gives the extra creepy effect.
hahaha.
so the scenario would be that b4 anyone enters the lec hall.
hang ourselves(at the centre of the hall, from the ceiling)
then when somebody comes in n switch on the lights.
lol. they'll be scared out of their wits.
***NOTE: do not choose secluded areas of the school becos eventually the school will cordoned off the area and then we will be forgotten.
***
lol. i need help.
counselling?
nah...not exactly sucidal la.
just thot of them for fun. hehex.
Sunday, October 8, 2006
exams r over.
wee?
nah.
i'll pass that.
no sense of satisfaction derived from end of exams.
n no sense of happiness.
bet evry1 is feeling so.
read some of their blogs n found out there r actually a lot of unhappy mjc ppl out there.
today at 10am(i was stil slping).
guess wad?
my ex-supervisor from ntuc called asked when my hols r starting.
in other words she wanted me back to work.
despite telling her tt i was unable to work til march(the peak periods due to cny)
she was stil willing to welcome me back.
she said she wanted ppl for nov n dec, n i was a good choice.
lol
i suppose tt's like the only place i can go to work wout a degree in hand.
she needed ppl. or perhaps she needed me.
lol i wldnt deny i was a pretty good worker there.
haha cos i was owaes doing the admin work.
though i m hired as a cashier.
[hey!! no fair i shud b receiving her pay cheque then ;p]
actually i dun intend to return to ntuc tho the ppl there r reli nice.
but i wish to find other place to work, if i reli do decide to work during the hols.
hmm...
if i were to work out a mindmap on 'future-routes- i-wld-take-in-future',
woah...it's gonna b 1 big mindmap.
cos currently it wld b either i go ntuc to work n go poly or not work n remain in mjc(tt is if i do not get kicked out)
life sucks when ur choices suck.
n now, my choices suck.
both of them.
all on extreme ends, so if i choose either 1 the outcome wld b v different?
ok let's analyse the situation...
***
[work at ntuc n go poly]
boon:
1. less stress
2. i get to study a course tt i wld reli like n want
3. i will be happier
4. my social circle is greatly widened[n there will b a higher possibility of being attached...lol]
bane:
1. lower chance of getting in uni?
2. i might b stuck at ntuc FOREVER!...[NOOOO...!!]
3. a hole in my wallet cos i will have to buy new clothes constantly[cos there is no more uniform in poly!]
conclusion:
despite the fact that there are more advantages if i were to work at ntuc n go poly. the thought of being stuck at ntuc forever really turns me off. [whoops. ;p sorry but i dun wan to be a cashier forever, makes my hands rough n dry]
therefore i conclude there is a very low possibility that these two will come together.
possibility of choice:10%
[work at ntuc n remain in mjc]
boon:
1. i get to work n earn money. ($.$)
2. i wont have to leave my frens n teachers ;)
3. higher chances of making it into uni
bane:
1. it's gonna b a tough struggle for me in the nxt few yrs to come.[ i have to work extra hard to catch up]
2. i will stil b stuck with doing things that i have no interest in
conclusion:
though it may sound reli nice tt i can get the cash n stil have a chance of making it into uni, i must stil rmb that comes with studying reli hard as well. so there is stil a chance of me not entering uni. n wad happens if i dont make it pass A levs? wad wld become of me then? return to ntuc? dont sound tempting anymore. yuck.
possibility of choice: 10%
[not work anywhere, stay hm n prepare for the oncoming battle during the nxt yr in mjc]
boon:
1. very high chance of becoming the nxt smart kid in town =)
2. very high chance of passing my A levs n make it into uni
3. i get to remain in mjc where everyone is
bane:
1. no more money :(
2. i'm the nxt mugger kid in town
3. higher chances of getting depression[hey! i'm alrdy a depressed kid]
4. my social circles will stil b v small...wahaha
conclusion:
although the disadvantages outweighs the advantages, it is stil very possible that i might eventually choose this option. because my final destination wld b uni:Architecture! =D
possibility of choice: 40%
[work somewhere else n go poly]
boon:
1. my social circle is greatly widen by the ppl from my workplace n learning institute
2. i get the money n i get the course i want
3. i m relaxed=>lower chances of getting depression
bane:
1. i become a slacker...lol[hmm...tis shud b under the boon section]
2. leaving all my frens in mjc
conclusion:
very very alluring. not much of anything to add, really.
possibility of choice: 40%
***
there ends my mindmap session of my future.
stay tune to more.
currently i only have these few choices.
if not where else can i go? LASELLE?
ooohh...i have thought of that.
in fact tt was my dream institute when i was in pri sch.
but then i realise the cost of going into the sch too high le la!!!
poor ppl like me cant afford!! O.o
nvm...
all is stil good.
***
oh yes...an added reminder to all those who felt that they have not worked hard enough.
it's ok. because it's over. no point griefing over wad is lost.
initially i thought i din work hard enough.
but then again...wad is 'working hard enough'?
i felt i have tried though i dont think it was my best.
well, there will nvr come a point when we wld feel that we have done our best.
wad's most impt tt we have done better than the last time, we have tried harder than the last time.
n tt was wad i did. =)
***
the sound of the waves crashing upon the shore conceals my cries of agony [silent screams]
wee?
nah.
i'll pass that.
no sense of satisfaction derived from end of exams.
n no sense of happiness.
bet evry1 is feeling so.
read some of their blogs n found out there r actually a lot of unhappy mjc ppl out there.
today at 10am(i was stil slping).
guess wad?
my ex-supervisor from ntuc called asked when my hols r starting.
in other words she wanted me back to work.
despite telling her tt i was unable to work til march(the peak periods due to cny)
she was stil willing to welcome me back.
she said she wanted ppl for nov n dec, n i was a good choice.
lol
i suppose tt's like the only place i can go to work wout a degree in hand.
she needed ppl. or perhaps she needed me.
lol i wldnt deny i was a pretty good worker there.
haha cos i was owaes doing the admin work.
though i m hired as a cashier.
[hey!! no fair i shud b receiving her pay cheque then ;p]
actually i dun intend to return to ntuc tho the ppl there r reli nice.
but i wish to find other place to work, if i reli do decide to work during the hols.
hmm...
if i were to work out a mindmap on 'future-routes- i-wld-take-in-future',
woah...it's gonna b 1 big mindmap.
cos currently it wld b either i go ntuc to work n go poly or not work n remain in mjc(tt is if i do not get kicked out)
life sucks when ur choices suck.
n now, my choices suck.
both of them.
all on extreme ends, so if i choose either 1 the outcome wld b v different?
ok let's analyse the situation...
***
[work at ntuc n go poly]
boon:
1. less stress
2. i get to study a course tt i wld reli like n want
3. i will be happier
4. my social circle is greatly widened[n there will b a higher possibility of being attached...lol]
bane:
1. lower chance of getting in uni?
2. i might b stuck at ntuc FOREVER!...[NOOOO...!!]
3. a hole in my wallet cos i will have to buy new clothes constantly[cos there is no more uniform in poly!]
conclusion:
despite the fact that there are more advantages if i were to work at ntuc n go poly. the thought of being stuck at ntuc forever really turns me off. [whoops. ;p sorry but i dun wan to be a cashier forever, makes my hands rough n dry]
therefore i conclude there is a very low possibility that these two will come together.
possibility of choice:10%
[work at ntuc n remain in mjc]
boon:
1. i get to work n earn money. ($.$)
2. i wont have to leave my frens n teachers ;)
3. higher chances of making it into uni
bane:
1. it's gonna b a tough struggle for me in the nxt few yrs to come.[ i have to work extra hard to catch up]
2. i will stil b stuck with doing things that i have no interest in
conclusion:
though it may sound reli nice tt i can get the cash n stil have a chance of making it into uni, i must stil rmb that comes with studying reli hard as well. so there is stil a chance of me not entering uni. n wad happens if i dont make it pass A levs? wad wld become of me then? return to ntuc? dont sound tempting anymore. yuck.
possibility of choice: 10%
[not work anywhere, stay hm n prepare for the oncoming battle during the nxt yr in mjc]
boon:
1. very high chance of becoming the nxt smart kid in town =)
2. very high chance of passing my A levs n make it into uni
3. i get to remain in mjc where everyone is
bane:
1. no more money :(
2. i'm the nxt mugger kid in town
3. higher chances of getting depression[hey! i'm alrdy a depressed kid]
4. my social circles will stil b v small...wahaha
conclusion:
although the disadvantages outweighs the advantages, it is stil very possible that i might eventually choose this option. because my final destination wld b uni:Architecture! =D
possibility of choice: 40%
[work somewhere else n go poly]
boon:
1. my social circle is greatly widen by the ppl from my workplace n learning institute
2. i get the money n i get the course i want
3. i m relaxed=>lower chances of getting depression
bane:
1. i become a slacker...lol[hmm...tis shud b under the boon section]
2. leaving all my frens in mjc
conclusion:
very very alluring. not much of anything to add, really.
possibility of choice: 40%
***
there ends my mindmap session of my future.
stay tune to more.
currently i only have these few choices.
if not where else can i go? LASELLE?
ooohh...i have thought of that.
in fact tt was my dream institute when i was in pri sch.
but then i realise the cost of going into the sch too high le la!!!
poor ppl like me cant afford!! O.o
nvm...
all is stil good.
***
oh yes...an added reminder to all those who felt that they have not worked hard enough.
it's ok. because it's over. no point griefing over wad is lost.
initially i thought i din work hard enough.
but then again...wad is 'working hard enough'?
i felt i have tried though i dont think it was my best.
well, there will nvr come a point when we wld feel that we have done our best.
wad's most impt tt we have done better than the last time, we have tried harder than the last time.
n tt was wad i did. =)
***
the sound of the waves crashing upon the shore conceals my cries of agony [silent screams]
Tuesday, September 12, 2006
can anybody pass me a 'shut-me-up' pill pls?
need it desperately...
need to get a zipper so i wont whine so much.
***
SHUT ME UP!!!
***
happy thoughts come my way.
need to brighten up.
just slacking my days away.
so much to do, yet so little time. (derived from "batman-the movie" by poison ivy)
find me a wall so i can smash my head into it,
so i can get a clear mind to work and study.
my mind is totally saturated from wadeva there is from pri sch to sec sch.
out of memory space.
darn.
***
shudnt be needing a 'shut-me-up' pill.
now i need a bigger memory space.
10gb? nah...
i need UNLIMITED memory space.
i need to plug in as many thumbdrives or sd memory cards into my head.
***
reach sch at 620am today. just to hand in econs essay
saw a shooting star along my way to the busstop.
lucky-me.
=D
made a wish.
betting everything on a burning rock.
sch was relatively good today.
got an A for my math summary.
yay.
but the colours are just so overwhelming.
my mum said tt it must have been the teacher surrendered while trying to read my summary so he had to give an A.
lol. sorry la.
***
doing eom now.
actually haben start.
i shud start le la.
bye. =)
need it desperately...
need to get a zipper so i wont whine so much.
***
SHUT ME UP!!!
***
happy thoughts come my way.
need to brighten up.
just slacking my days away.
so much to do, yet so little time. (derived from "batman-the movie" by poison ivy)
find me a wall so i can smash my head into it,
so i can get a clear mind to work and study.
my mind is totally saturated from wadeva there is from pri sch to sec sch.
out of memory space.
darn.
***
shudnt be needing a 'shut-me-up' pill.
now i need a bigger memory space.
10gb? nah...
i need UNLIMITED memory space.
i need to plug in as many thumbdrives or sd memory cards into my head.
***
reach sch at 620am today. just to hand in econs essay
saw a shooting star along my way to the busstop.
lucky-me.
=D
made a wish.
betting everything on a burning rock.
sch was relatively good today.
got an A for my math summary.
yay.
but the colours are just so overwhelming.
my mum said tt it must have been the teacher surrendered while trying to read my summary so he had to give an A.
lol. sorry la.
***
doing eom now.
actually haben start.
i shud start le la.
bye. =)
Saturday, September 9, 2006
the week is gonna end.
but wad have i done.
haben been hearing frm my frens for quite some time.
must have been mugging hard at hm.
watching tv the whole day.==>me
i can tell u all the tv timeslots for almost every channel.
[no joke.]
tv-addict.
cant cure it.
sorry mum.
lol
smashing the tv wun cure me i tink.
there must b some tv temptation radio active waves emmiting from the tv constantly cos i cant seem to sit in my room for a sec just to study.
the 'waves' kinda 'pull' me out n i'll b watching tv agn.
shucks.
will anybody gimme a hard knock on the head??
i mean a reli hard 1.
i tink the mid-yrs gave me a big n hard knock.
but not exactly lasting enuf.
became a mugger only for a short period of time n i reverted back into my old ways aft tt.
lol.
lousy me.
Grr...
cant bring myself to lie, saying mugging is fun.
cos it totally sucks.
regretted my choice in my combi.
shud have chosen an easier 1.
cos like wad archi has to do w biology???
or even chemistry???
i dun even have to noe the chemical formula for cement!
[hilarious]
n it will b as if i wld need differentiation when i draft out the blueprint of a landmark.
lol.
[laughing my head off]
yucks.
so not motivated to study.
a lot of news abt ppl jumping off buildings recently.
[erm...ok mayb sometime ago, not exactly so recent]
perhaps i shud follow suit.
i'm entertaining stupid thots agn.
life is still good la hor??
as i'm typing my new entry, i have already wasted almost half an hr of studying time.
lol.
***
off to do my 4th draft of eom.
take care muggers.
drink more water ;D
but wad have i done.
haben been hearing frm my frens for quite some time.
must have been mugging hard at hm.
watching tv the whole day.==>me
i can tell u all the tv timeslots for almost every channel.
[no joke.]
tv-addict.
cant cure it.
sorry mum.
lol
smashing the tv wun cure me i tink.
there must b some tv temptation radio active waves emmiting from the tv constantly cos i cant seem to sit in my room for a sec just to study.
the 'waves' kinda 'pull' me out n i'll b watching tv agn.
shucks.
will anybody gimme a hard knock on the head??
i mean a reli hard 1.
i tink the mid-yrs gave me a big n hard knock.
but not exactly lasting enuf.
became a mugger only for a short period of time n i reverted back into my old ways aft tt.
lol.
lousy me.
Grr...
cant bring myself to lie, saying mugging is fun.
cos it totally sucks.
regretted my choice in my combi.
shud have chosen an easier 1.
cos like wad archi has to do w biology???
or even chemistry???
i dun even have to noe the chemical formula for cement!
[hilarious]
n it will b as if i wld need differentiation when i draft out the blueprint of a landmark.
lol.
[laughing my head off]
yucks.
so not motivated to study.
a lot of news abt ppl jumping off buildings recently.
[erm...ok mayb sometime ago, not exactly so recent]
perhaps i shud follow suit.
i'm entertaining stupid thots agn.
life is still good la hor??
as i'm typing my new entry, i have already wasted almost half an hr of studying time.
lol.
***
off to do my 4th draft of eom.
take care muggers.
drink more water ;D
Sunday, September 3, 2006
at last i manage to start in.
today went swimming w jx, karen n ser.
v long nvr c jx le.
lol. happy bday to me.
1 week past le.
i m 17!
i m old.
3 yrs later n i will hit 20.
then in another 10 yrs i will b 30.
omg.
o.o
lao le la!
promos r coming.
i wan to start but i duno where to.
too much things tt i wish to do but r eventually left undone.
cos there r so many qns.
no life at all.
owaes blog abt sch.
hmm...
mayb another happening event is the day when almost the whole class stayed to do the tshirts n we stayed till 12midnight.
then liwen's papa send us hm.
we sat at the back of the lorry.
so happening.
got me, ser, yangzi, liwen n jianrong.
so cool la.
haha.
thanks to liwen n her pa!
THANK YOU!
then on teacher celeb day, we had it in the sch hall due to bad weather.
aft tt we went to tm to watch 'the devil wears prada'
it was a good show.
3.5 stars out of 5.
it's only the ending which is reli abrupt.
nevertheless, stil a good show.
anna hathaway so chio-ed.
!!! love her dress sense.
wee...
aft the movie i was v tired so became v ap then went hm lor.
haha. no life.
today went swimming w jx, karen n ser.
v long nvr c jx le.
lol. happy bday to me.
1 week past le.
i m 17!
i m old.
3 yrs later n i will hit 20.
then in another 10 yrs i will b 30.
omg.
o.o
lao le la!
promos r coming.
i wan to start but i duno where to.
too much things tt i wish to do but r eventually left undone.
cos there r so many qns.
no life at all.
owaes blog abt sch.
hmm...
mayb another happening event is the day when almost the whole class stayed to do the tshirts n we stayed till 12midnight.
then liwen's papa send us hm.
we sat at the back of the lorry.
so happening.
got me, ser, yangzi, liwen n jianrong.
so cool la.
haha.
thanks to liwen n her pa!
THANK YOU!
then on teacher celeb day, we had it in the sch hall due to bad weather.
aft tt we went to tm to watch 'the devil wears prada'
it was a good show.
3.5 stars out of 5.
it's only the ending which is reli abrupt.
nevertheless, stil a good show.
anna hathaway so chio-ed.
!!! love her dress sense.
wee...
aft the movie i was v tired so became v ap then went hm lor.
haha. no life.
Thursday, August 24, 2006
i managed to sign in today.
cldn't sign in the past few days.
anw...been giving myself a lot of stress i suppose.
then now, not only m i worried abt promos.
i'm oso worried abt getting into the course that i wan in uni.
dun even noe if i can make it.
a few yrs ago.
the cut off point for architecture in NUS is >60 n the max points tt 1 can get is 68.
so it's kinda impossible to get into this course.
plus i wld need an interview to affirm my position in the archi course.
so i got rather upset tt day when i heard abt it.
it so of made me lose the incentive to work harder anymore.
so i got rather a-p recently.
ppl use to say tt being a doctor or a lawyer is a prestigious job, but nobody ever mention architects.
they are afterall the ones who lay the foundation of the country when it was founded.
they are the ones who ensure us with a safely-structured and comfortable home.
being a doctor wld have been an easier option, in fact.
becos the course does not require an interview and the cut-off point is only 50+.
so it seems relatively easier.
lol. irony.
n to tink some ppl might tink being a doctor is a tougher job.
but i dun deny tt being a lawyer requires much intelligence and attention.
the requirements for entering the 'law' course in NUS is equivalent to tt of archi.
sigh...
big SIGH...
***
Mugging is no longer an option, it is a MUST.
cldn't sign in the past few days.
anw...been giving myself a lot of stress i suppose.
then now, not only m i worried abt promos.
i'm oso worried abt getting into the course that i wan in uni.
dun even noe if i can make it.
a few yrs ago.
the cut off point for architecture in NUS is >60 n the max points tt 1 can get is 68.
so it's kinda impossible to get into this course.
plus i wld need an interview to affirm my position in the archi course.
so i got rather upset tt day when i heard abt it.
it so of made me lose the incentive to work harder anymore.
so i got rather a-p recently.
ppl use to say tt being a doctor or a lawyer is a prestigious job, but nobody ever mention architects.
they are afterall the ones who lay the foundation of the country when it was founded.
they are the ones who ensure us with a safely-structured and comfortable home.
being a doctor wld have been an easier option, in fact.
becos the course does not require an interview and the cut-off point is only 50+.
so it seems relatively easier.
lol. irony.
n to tink some ppl might tink being a doctor is a tougher job.
but i dun deny tt being a lawyer requires much intelligence and attention.
the requirements for entering the 'law' course in NUS is equivalent to tt of archi.
sigh...
big SIGH...
***
Mugging is no longer an option, it is a MUST.
Monday, August 14, 2006
1st day of sch aft the long weekend.
din had enuf slp despite the fact i had the whole 5 days.
wasnt exactly good today actually.
bad in fact.
my morale was fluctuating during different lessons.
econs:[morale=-1.5]
chem:[morale=2]
cos i passed my chem test though i din do the last qn.
lol.
then after sch:[morale:0.5]
haha.
cos i was doing econs.
econs totally dampens my spirits.
sorry ahtan for ap-ing u.
actually i din.
just tt i get unusually upset when it's lesson time
so i become reli easily peeved.
after sch it's much beta cos i get to do things at my pace.
no rush.
so the mood naturally gets beta, i suppose.
=)
overall morale for the day:[morale=1.00] (3 s.f.)
;p
din had enuf slp despite the fact i had the whole 5 days.
wasnt exactly good today actually.
bad in fact.
my morale was fluctuating during different lessons.
econs:[morale=-1.5]
chem:[morale=2]
cos i passed my chem test though i din do the last qn.
lol.
then after sch:[morale:0.5]
haha.
cos i was doing econs.
econs totally dampens my spirits.
sorry ahtan for ap-ing u.
actually i din.
just tt i get unusually upset when it's lesson time
so i become reli easily peeved.
after sch it's much beta cos i get to do things at my pace.
no rush.
so the mood naturally gets beta, i suppose.
=)
overall morale for the day:[morale=1.00] (3 s.f.)
;p
Saturday, August 12, 2006
Friday, August 4, 2006
seen the vp.
not i a v good experience i wld say.
went to the general office on thurs.
sat down at the sofa n waited.
then spencer cam out n told me it was bad.
ok so it WAS bad.
the moment i stepped in.
she asked those same qns tt the teachers asked.
[got frustrated]
didn't know wad to say.
so i just let the tear glands do the job.
wadeva.
bad experience.
spent a freaking 1 hr to do a workplan which she wanted.
waste of time.
lol kept saying i wanted to die tt day.
but nah...
too afraid of pain.
but mayb[just mayb] if i do go crazy i might reli just jump off a building without myself knowing. haha.
so it was like a reli bad day for me tt day.
then i kept saying stupid stuff like jumping off from the 2nd floor of the sch wun kill me.
at most i'll just bcome a vegetable, even if i do land head first.
a teacher heard me n she totally freaked out, her jaws dropped.
lol [tt was according to corine]
hahaha.
my tears glands sure worked hard tt day.
it was a non-stop tap, just kept flowing.
got reli tired.
realise i became so haggard n there were dark rings n eyebags.
i looked totally 'yuck'.
[it's just tt i look v frail?? i mean i look reli tired]
haben been getting enuf slp.
thruout the week i got abt 19hrs of slp.
an average of abt less than 4hrs of slp a day.
cool...to tink i can stil survive.
woah. i m amazed.
***
eversince i came to tis sch.
i have mastered two skills.
the ability to be a walking zombie n
the ability to let my tears flow whenever n where-ever i wan.
just in sch today.
we had to meet our pw teacher regarding the grp issue.
there was some displeasure amongst the grp members.
it was 4 against 1.
actually it was more like 2 against 1 n the other 2 was sitting on the fence.
then my teacher was supposedly the 'meditator'.
well he didnt quite do his job in meditating us.
he just stood there n got us to voice out our happiness.
well it all started w tis boy or guy [wadeva he is]
anyway, he didnt quite do his part for the grp so me n another grp member got reli pissed.
so we confronted the teacher.
yup. so the teacher got us together which wasnt reli of any help bcos i got reli pissed.
my face looked horrid.
i was glaring at tt guy n i gave my teacher the 'dun-u-dare-piss-me-off' look.
my teacher knew i was unhappy w the whole thing.
asked me to voice out wad i felt.
com'on!! i've talked to him nicely i even screamed at him!!
wad more can i do if tt boy or guy doesn't even wana do his part right??!!
man...i'm pissed.
[the keyboard is gonna go soon. at the way i'm typing the keys on the board might just get stuck. i'm pressing real hard on evry key right now cos i'm reli pissed. lol]
==>[sorry for the lack of vocab. but pissed is just the right word to describ ewad i'm feeling right now]
ok mayb frustrated as well.
i feel lousy anyway.
i even talked back at the teacher cos he said,"u all shud try to get along cos afterall u all chose the grp."
o.O
i said,"NO..! we didn't choose the grps ourselves!"
it was a good thing the teach didnt hear me.
i cld have sworn tt i wld have killed 'uh-hmm' if i had a knife in my hand.
slit his throat n let the air leak from his windpipe til his lungs deflate.
n cut all his arteries n let his blood run dry then i'll minced the meat. wahaha.
lol. i most prob wld have been jailed for tt.
haha. lightest sentence wld have been man-slaughter.
life sentence in jail.
[sorry. woman=evil]
***
then after sch we had bio remedial lectures.
i broke down as soon as i went out of the lecture theatre.
i duno y but my tears glands just went against me.
i reli din wana cry.
i just cldnt help it.
[morale=still 0]
not i a v good experience i wld say.
went to the general office on thurs.
sat down at the sofa n waited.
then spencer cam out n told me it was bad.
ok so it WAS bad.
the moment i stepped in.
she asked those same qns tt the teachers asked.
[got frustrated]
didn't know wad to say.
so i just let the tear glands do the job.
wadeva.
bad experience.
spent a freaking 1 hr to do a workplan which she wanted.
waste of time.
lol kept saying i wanted to die tt day.
but nah...
too afraid of pain.
but mayb[just mayb] if i do go crazy i might reli just jump off a building without myself knowing. haha.
so it was like a reli bad day for me tt day.
then i kept saying stupid stuff like jumping off from the 2nd floor of the sch wun kill me.
at most i'll just bcome a vegetable, even if i do land head first.
a teacher heard me n she totally freaked out, her jaws dropped.
lol [tt was according to corine]
hahaha.
my tears glands sure worked hard tt day.
it was a non-stop tap, just kept flowing.
got reli tired.
realise i became so haggard n there were dark rings n eyebags.
i looked totally 'yuck'.
[it's just tt i look v frail?? i mean i look reli tired]
haben been getting enuf slp.
thruout the week i got abt 19hrs of slp.
an average of abt less than 4hrs of slp a day.
cool...to tink i can stil survive.
woah. i m amazed.
***
eversince i came to tis sch.
i have mastered two skills.
the ability to be a walking zombie n
the ability to let my tears flow whenever n where-ever i wan.
just in sch today.
we had to meet our pw teacher regarding the grp issue.
there was some displeasure amongst the grp members.
it was 4 against 1.
actually it was more like 2 against 1 n the other 2 was sitting on the fence.
then my teacher was supposedly the 'meditator'.
well he didnt quite do his job in meditating us.
he just stood there n got us to voice out our happiness.
well it all started w tis boy or guy [wadeva he is]
anyway, he didnt quite do his part for the grp so me n another grp member got reli pissed.
so we confronted the teacher.
yup. so the teacher got us together which wasnt reli of any help bcos i got reli pissed.
my face looked horrid.
i was glaring at tt guy n i gave my teacher the 'dun-u-dare-piss-me-off' look.
my teacher knew i was unhappy w the whole thing.
asked me to voice out wad i felt.
com'on!! i've talked to him nicely i even screamed at him!!
wad more can i do if tt boy or guy doesn't even wana do his part right??!!
man...i'm pissed.
[the keyboard is gonna go soon. at the way i'm typing the keys on the board might just get stuck. i'm pressing real hard on evry key right now cos i'm reli pissed. lol]
==>[sorry for the lack of vocab. but pissed is just the right word to describ ewad i'm feeling right now]
ok mayb frustrated as well.
i feel lousy anyway.
i even talked back at the teacher cos he said,"u all shud try to get along cos afterall u all chose the grp."
o.O
i said,"NO..! we didn't choose the grps ourselves!"
it was a good thing the teach didnt hear me.
i cld have sworn tt i wld have killed 'uh-hmm' if i had a knife in my hand.
slit his throat n let the air leak from his windpipe til his lungs deflate.
n cut all his arteries n let his blood run dry then i'll minced the meat. wahaha.
lol. i most prob wld have been jailed for tt.
haha. lightest sentence wld have been man-slaughter.
life sentence in jail.
[sorry. woman=evil]
***
then after sch we had bio remedial lectures.
i broke down as soon as i went out of the lecture theatre.
i duno y but my tears glands just went against me.
i reli din wana cry.
i just cldnt help it.
[morale=still 0]
Tuesday, August 1, 2006
2nd time i'm here today.
i use to wonder how can ppl actually study w music?
then at last i realise y.
it's to prevent ourselves from falling aslp while doing our work.
it kinda worked for me.
so perhaps all those who r suffering from the 'i-get-slpy-when-i-work' syndrome can actually give this a try.
it might b effective!
***
btw thx to all who cares.
lol
been talking abt suicide lately cos life is so depressing.
[morale=zero]
reached hm today, got alil pissed by my mum cos everyday(mind u i mean EVERYDAY), withour fail she'll definitely ask how's my math.
got reli irritated cos it's like how good can it get over a single night??!
got reli tired of answering her qns.
but then when i was cooping myself up in the room to do the chem tys qns which was only told to us by today n which we will have to hand in by tml, my mum came in.
she kinda stared at me.
ok mayb just a very long look.
then i looked at her.
i was like, "what?"
then she asked,"hen nan du ah?" (means: very difficult to study isit?)
i nodded.
she said,"ni yao zhuan qu poly ah?" (means: u wana go poly isit?)
i shook my head.
[all the above conv are in chi]
i din wana go poly cos it's not tt it will b any easier to get into the uni.
i cried when my mum went out of my room.
cos i was touched.
i somehow felt that she understood me at last.
now that both my parents knew how i felt, all the more i shudn't let them down.
i'm tired. i reli am.
and the real battle hasn't even started.
only in the midst of a warm-up n i'm alr breaking down.
[worn-out]
***
special thanks to ah tan.
whom despite of her bz schedule, stil made time to email me.
she asked me to relax. comforted me.
cos it's like i kinda change aft i came to jc.
cos jc life is so stress for me n i'm going bonkers.
kept talking abt suicide stuff.
thx ah tan. =)
[looking forward to thurs ;p]
[i pray HARD tt 06S304 will promote as a WHOLE class.]
i use to wonder how can ppl actually study w music?
then at last i realise y.
it's to prevent ourselves from falling aslp while doing our work.
it kinda worked for me.
so perhaps all those who r suffering from the 'i-get-slpy-when-i-work' syndrome can actually give this a try.
it might b effective!
***
btw thx to all who cares.
lol
been talking abt suicide lately cos life is so depressing.
[morale=zero]
reached hm today, got alil pissed by my mum cos everyday(mind u i mean EVERYDAY), withour fail she'll definitely ask how's my math.
got reli irritated cos it's like how good can it get over a single night??!
got reli tired of answering her qns.
but then when i was cooping myself up in the room to do the chem tys qns which was only told to us by today n which we will have to hand in by tml, my mum came in.
she kinda stared at me.
ok mayb just a very long look.
then i looked at her.
i was like, "what?"
then she asked,"hen nan du ah?" (means: very difficult to study isit?)
i nodded.
she said,"ni yao zhuan qu poly ah?" (means: u wana go poly isit?)
i shook my head.
[all the above conv are in chi]
i din wana go poly cos it's not tt it will b any easier to get into the uni.
i cried when my mum went out of my room.
cos i was touched.
i somehow felt that she understood me at last.
now that both my parents knew how i felt, all the more i shudn't let them down.
i'm tired. i reli am.
and the real battle hasn't even started.
only in the midst of a warm-up n i'm alr breaking down.
[worn-out]
***
special thanks to ah tan.
whom despite of her bz schedule, stil made time to email me.
she asked me to relax. comforted me.
cos it's like i kinda change aft i came to jc.
cos jc life is so stress for me n i'm going bonkers.
kept talking abt suicide stuff.
thx ah tan. =)
[looking forward to thurs ;p]
[i pray HARD tt 06S304 will promote as a WHOLE class.]
ok now i'm sad again.
my happiness nvr did last.
n it owaes don't.
got real depressed after math tutorial today.
nobody understands me.
last resort: suicide
but that will only b the last resort.
so what's next?
nxt resort: tink of ways to suicide, die a peaceful n painless death
had to c the vp on thurs.
woah.
felt kinda important all of a sudden.
nvr in my life had i need to meet the vice principal bcos of results.
in sec sch, i meet the vp cos of founder's day proposals.
rmb those times when me n my teacher n the vp were discussing over the proposals
n now i'm all alone to talk abt results.
lol.
i m FAMOUS.
*wooT*
why doesn't anyone try to know how i feel?
why does everyone put on that 'i-understand-how-u-feel' look.
irks me.
puts me off.
scram.
Sunday, July 30, 2006
Happy Birthday to u,
Happy Birthday to u,
Happy Birthday...to xiao zhu...
Happy Birthday to u....
HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO LUO ZHI XIANG!!!
***
today is xiao zhu birthday. yay.
wishing him a great career ahead
n may his singing get beta n beta.
n his looks get shuai-er n shuai-er.
n wishing him that when his 4th album come out in october, it would b a hit!
jia you le!! xiao zhu. ai ni! =)
***
got invited to eat at a ballroom yday.
food was great.
yup the best part was after we left, me mx sn n ahtan went tm.
then i bought a new wallet!
yay.
so did mx.
she bought a new pencil case too.
hehex.
we bought the same wallet only diff colour.
but it was stil nice.
v pretty.
29 bucks now i'm reli broke.
wadeva.
i got my wallet.
now i'm searching for a bag.
a nice bag.
=)
wee...
[huiyuan's a HAPPY girl.]
[happy..sha-la-la-la-la]
Wednesday, July 26, 2006
Sunday, July 23, 2006
went to mtps yday.
lol i cried like nobody's business in front of the teachers n my pa.
my pa was kinda used to seeing me cry so he was ok.
but i tink i freaked the teachers out a bit.
lol ng even thot tt my home had the case of child-abusal or something.
or perhaps even violence at hm.
he asked tt if i felt uncomfortable talking to my pa can go look for him.
=.=
lol
com'on not evrybody comes from a broken family tt i would have to seek comfort from the teachers.
i din cry cos my pa pressurized me or anything.
it's just tt i got reli fed when ng n goh kept asking the same qns.
n it's not as if they ask it wld help me in anyway.
they kept asking how they can help or how i was gonna manage my time.
stuff lidat.
n that was so lame.
n the lamest thing was they say i look reli tired in sch.
they asked me to slp early but at the same time they wan me to complete my tutorials.
[contradiction]
i cant slp unless i finish my work.
n normally i cant finish my work.
heavy workload.
n my pa was so funny cos he kept saying that it cld have been the sch's prob or the teachers' prob tt the students were faring badly.
lol.
my pa even ask ng a qn tt left ng dumb-founded.
[hilarious]
not much of a help actually, just sat there n let my tears roll.
while my pa kept defending me.
then it was like i got reli fed up w all the bullshit that the teachers were saying bcos i dun tink tt aft the session it wld make my life any beta.
waste of time.
i wld rather stay hm n revise rather than sitting there n allow myself to dehydrate.
my pa converse in chi n goh din say much.
ng did most of the talking.
i cried til i choke on my tears.
my pa ask me to go to the toilet.
walked past the corridor n evrybody stared as if i just kana frm the teachers n my pa.
but no...
just got fed up w sch work.
my pa said perhaps it was the studying environment bcos i was nvr tis lousy n they nvr had to worry abt my studies.
then ng said tt they'll c aft a yr to c if i was suited for a jc environment n if not i cld go to a poly.
i was like wth??!
then wad was i here for?
to waste a yr of my youth n b cooped up in tis freaking place just to enjoy the pressure n go crazy frm it??
i told ng tt even if i go poly i wld stil have to do independent learning n it's not as if the workload wld b any lesser.
so wake up!! a plea to all teachers out there...pls dun try to tink tt u understand the students bcos u dun.
aftall we were here for only half a yr n how much will u noe in half a yr?
[other than we did real lousy for the mid-yrs otherwise nthg abt us is reli made known to u]
***
big thanks to someone tt day.
not my pa.
although i reli wana tell him thank you personally for defending me. love him lots. =)
well....(drumroll)
the person was yangzi.
realise tt a true fren sometimes need not have to b ur best fren.
it's just tt when u're reli sad n u need someone to talk to, a true fren comes along n lends u a listening ear.
reli hated myself tt day for crying but yangzi stood there n did little things tt reli touches me.
she din reli said much but she just stood by me.
THANK YOU!!
big smiles =)))
***
the truth abt ng being bias is out.
he said he was not.
yz n me confronted him.
he told us that when a person dun chase aft another person for work is when he couldnt care less.
n he got reli pissed w "uh-hmm" so he reli din wana care any more.
we told him abt "uh-hmm" not wanting to contribute much for pw n he said he wld look into it.
ok so now i dun dislike ng as much.
=)
[i'm easily satisfied]
***
in the evening i went to visit my aunt at the hospital.
a new member has arrived in the family.
it's a girl!!
so now i have another playmate who's 17 yrs younger than me.
man...do i feel old or wad?
lol
*muacks to the little girl she was so cute!!
all babies r cute but she was the cutest.
haha.
lol i cried like nobody's business in front of the teachers n my pa.
my pa was kinda used to seeing me cry so he was ok.
but i tink i freaked the teachers out a bit.
lol ng even thot tt my home had the case of child-abusal or something.
or perhaps even violence at hm.
he asked tt if i felt uncomfortable talking to my pa can go look for him.
=.=
lol
com'on not evrybody comes from a broken family tt i would have to seek comfort from the teachers.
i din cry cos my pa pressurized me or anything.
it's just tt i got reli fed when ng n goh kept asking the same qns.
n it's not as if they ask it wld help me in anyway.
they kept asking how they can help or how i was gonna manage my time.
stuff lidat.
n that was so lame.
n the lamest thing was they say i look reli tired in sch.
they asked me to slp early but at the same time they wan me to complete my tutorials.
[contradiction]
i cant slp unless i finish my work.
n normally i cant finish my work.
heavy workload.
n my pa was so funny cos he kept saying that it cld have been the sch's prob or the teachers' prob tt the students were faring badly.
lol.
my pa even ask ng a qn tt left ng dumb-founded.
[hilarious]
not much of a help actually, just sat there n let my tears roll.
while my pa kept defending me.
then it was like i got reli fed up w all the bullshit that the teachers were saying bcos i dun tink tt aft the session it wld make my life any beta.
waste of time.
i wld rather stay hm n revise rather than sitting there n allow myself to dehydrate.
my pa converse in chi n goh din say much.
ng did most of the talking.
i cried til i choke on my tears.
my pa ask me to go to the toilet.
walked past the corridor n evrybody stared as if i just kana frm the teachers n my pa.
but no...
just got fed up w sch work.
my pa said perhaps it was the studying environment bcos i was nvr tis lousy n they nvr had to worry abt my studies.
then ng said tt they'll c aft a yr to c if i was suited for a jc environment n if not i cld go to a poly.
i was like wth??!
then wad was i here for?
to waste a yr of my youth n b cooped up in tis freaking place just to enjoy the pressure n go crazy frm it??
i told ng tt even if i go poly i wld stil have to do independent learning n it's not as if the workload wld b any lesser.
so wake up!! a plea to all teachers out there...pls dun try to tink tt u understand the students bcos u dun.
aftall we were here for only half a yr n how much will u noe in half a yr?
[other than we did real lousy for the mid-yrs otherwise nthg abt us is reli made known to u]
***
big thanks to someone tt day.
not my pa.
although i reli wana tell him thank you personally for defending me. love him lots. =)
well....(drumroll)
the person was yangzi.
realise tt a true fren sometimes need not have to b ur best fren.
it's just tt when u're reli sad n u need someone to talk to, a true fren comes along n lends u a listening ear.
reli hated myself tt day for crying but yangzi stood there n did little things tt reli touches me.
she din reli said much but she just stood by me.
THANK YOU!!
big smiles =)))
***
the truth abt ng being bias is out.
he said he was not.
yz n me confronted him.
he told us that when a person dun chase aft another person for work is when he couldnt care less.
n he got reli pissed w "uh-hmm" so he reli din wana care any more.
we told him abt "uh-hmm" not wanting to contribute much for pw n he said he wld look into it.
ok so now i dun dislike ng as much.
=)
[i'm easily satisfied]
***
in the evening i went to visit my aunt at the hospital.
a new member has arrived in the family.
it's a girl!!
so now i have another playmate who's 17 yrs younger than me.
man...do i feel old or wad?
lol
*muacks to the little girl she was so cute!!
all babies r cute but she was the cutest.
haha.
Friday, July 21, 2006
went back ahs today.
not for any special reasons.
just went back to reminise the old times.
love tt environment.
even the air smells fresher there.
pic i took w ser when we walking up the slope.
cool rite.
lol [left is ser, right is me =)]
saw mr chan.
he looks even older now.
more white hair.
miss him.
esp the way he teaches us.
esp now tt in mjc i got a teacher hu is full of bullshit.
ok not one.
mayb a few.
***
got kb by my pw a.k.a math a.k.a form teacher today.
i use to tink he was a good teacher bcos he reli did try his best.
n somehow ppl just din wan to listen to him.
so i try to do my tutorials.
but sometimes it's not that i dun want to do.
but teachers must understand that we ARE afterall students.
n we are here to learn.
we dun come in smart like u.
n they expect that after going thru the lecture once we are like the super absorbent sponge.
evrything goes in n stays in.
sorry to say but no.
[if we do know evryting all teachers will be jobless]
i dun understand the lecture sometimes.
[the teachers will definitely say then i shud have consult them]
but...the prob is that since we dun understand wad is happening during the tutorials, do u tink that by repeating wad he say during a consultation we wld understand?
[you'll need a miracle for that]
consultations are when you dun listen to lectures n dun quite catch wad the lecturer is talking abt.
so in lay man's term a consultation is just a repetition of the lecture or tutorial.
but wad happens aft tt if we listen n stil do not understand?
since we cant understand the teacher now do u seriously tink we will understand him aft tt?
kinda suck at evryting.
i'm v upset.
upset over today.
***
oh ya i have yet to describe abt the kb-ing by my teach.
hate him cos he is so bias towards one student.
just becos he has some defect in speech?
or becos of pity, tt evry1 in class ostrasize him??
wadeva the reason, he is just bias.
make me reli pissed.
he can be the most ignorant to that particular student abt handing in of work.
but to us,
even if we do hand in he just gives us shit talk.
y do teachers always tink tt they are right?
y do they not take the stand of the students n tink in a different perspective?
perhaps tt wld just make life easier.
we were late.
i admit but exact time was not stated.
so it wasnt totally our fault for being late.
plus we did not c the msg.
the teacher was nvr particular abt this sort of things but today he just pisses me off.
wadeva.
if not for the fact tt all of us will b sitting for the a lev do u tink any1 wld wana give a damn abt the pw?
to hell whoever invented pw.
waste of time.
[spit]
tml is meet the parent session n i will be seeing him agn.
cant even let me off during the weekends.
seeing his face makes me puke.
[ok mayb a bit of over-doing there but reli disgusted abt him]
***
haha...weekends are here. but only 7weeks left to promos.
jiayou ppl.
we shall n we will promote as a class. WHOLE.
we will not b look down on my some f**king teachers ok.? =)
Smilez.
Wednesday, July 19, 2006
haa.
thx to evry1's concern.
love ya ppl out there cos even at worst times, u all were stil by my side.
all of a sudden i reli miss ahs
ppl say u nvr miss or tink abt someone or something until it is gone.
n now tt i have left ahs i reli miss the dear old place.
miss the environment.
miss the teachers.
miss my frens.
=( cries.
i miss those times when ahs is such a condusive environment.
i use to tink i knew myself but now i dun.
now i duno wad i reli wan.
thot i could work under stress but i realise i was so wrong.
stress nvr work for me in mjc.
broke down a few times alr.
the teachers nvr did try to understand the students.
they only noe all the shit talk.
they all tink they had halos on their heads and as if they were sent from heaven as saviours to save us.
over my dead body. pukes.
they just make sch feel more like hell.
i got reli depressed.
n when i get depressed i cant study.
n when i cant study, my grades go tumbling.
n when my grades go tumbling, my teachers n my mum starts to nag.
[pressure=>depressed]
it's all a vicious cycle.
hate the environment hate tis place.
makes me wana cry each time i thot abt sch work.
i reli dun wish to give a damn but can i??
hu is to ans to my agony?
hu is to tell me wad i'm suppose to do?
suicide is nvr an option for me.
but perhaps one day it might b?
***
today the gp teach wanted to c me.
i din reli mind so wth i went to c her.
some crap talk tt lasted abt 5min.
she said tt she was gonna c my parents during mtps.
n she said how is she gonna tell my parents abt my results then??
without embarassing me.
i was like wth???!!
i freaking PASS my gp n here she is w some bullshit!
cut the crap missy.
i pass my gp so tt's the end of the line.
your job is done.
ok perhaps u din quite catch tt, your job is done! as in D-O-N-E!!
get it??
so i told her.
just tell them in wadeva way she like.
[i dun care]
my father is the one going.
it's not tt he doesnt care abt my studies.
he does but somehow i tink he noes tt i did try so he din push me harder.
unlike my mum.
she just dun understand.
the teachers dun understand either.
sometimes i just wan to break down in front of them to show them my displeasure but wad can i do??
i'm in sch...hello??!
***
so it's like there's no one i can reli confide into.
sorry pa for being so rude the other day.
it was late at night he ask me to slp early.
din ans him.
then he popped a random qn n asked how was i coping in sch?
he nvr showed such concern.
i was pissed abt hw tt day n not being able to slp early so i said," so wad if sch is tough?? wad can i do? i stil have to continue, it's not as if there's anyone to help me."
then my pa got pissed cos he asked out of concern n i was being reli rude.
i'm sorry.
i know tt he cares. =) thanks pa.
then on another day he told me tt i reli must study hard.
cos he said when he was young he didnt work hard n he ended getting sick of studying bcos he couldnt understand so he kinda gave up on his studies.
he told me to work hard n tt i shud try to understand my work so tt i wun have to work as hard as him to earn big bucks.
n it's not as if he's earning a lot.
i know he cares.
my mum cares too tt's y she keeps pressing me to go for tuition.
but now she doesnt cos she knows tt i din wan it.
ok i love my parents. aww...
they just wish tt i would work hard now so that i wun have to work as hard in future.
but i realise i'm reli brain-drained.
evryting just keeps coming in n going out. nthg stays.
***
no one to turn to.
no where to go.
cant possibly break down in front of my frens n tell them i hate sch the moment i c them rite??
tt wld b like lol.
if i reli do so.
i wld b crying evry single day.
i will try to work hard.
so ppl ard me,
PLEASE as in reli PLEASE if u r considering to confront me abt working hard in my studies.
please dun.
cos u r not me.
n u will definitely not noe wad i'm going thru.
thx for the concern anw. =)
[may God bless 06S304 to promote as a WHOLE class =D]
thx to evry1's concern.
love ya ppl out there cos even at worst times, u all were stil by my side.
all of a sudden i reli miss ahs
ppl say u nvr miss or tink abt someone or something until it is gone.
n now tt i have left ahs i reli miss the dear old place.
miss the environment.
miss the teachers.
miss my frens.
=( cries.
i miss those times when ahs is such a condusive environment.
i use to tink i knew myself but now i dun.
now i duno wad i reli wan.
thot i could work under stress but i realise i was so wrong.
stress nvr work for me in mjc.
broke down a few times alr.
the teachers nvr did try to understand the students.
they only noe all the shit talk.
they all tink they had halos on their heads and as if they were sent from heaven as saviours to save us.
over my dead body. pukes.
they just make sch feel more like hell.
i got reli depressed.
n when i get depressed i cant study.
n when i cant study, my grades go tumbling.
n when my grades go tumbling, my teachers n my mum starts to nag.
[pressure=>depressed]
it's all a vicious cycle.
hate the environment hate tis place.
makes me wana cry each time i thot abt sch work.
i reli dun wish to give a damn but can i??
hu is to ans to my agony?
hu is to tell me wad i'm suppose to do?
suicide is nvr an option for me.
but perhaps one day it might b?
***
today the gp teach wanted to c me.
i din reli mind so wth i went to c her.
some crap talk tt lasted abt 5min.
she said tt she was gonna c my parents during mtps.
n she said how is she gonna tell my parents abt my results then??
without embarassing me.
i was like wth???!!
i freaking PASS my gp n here she is w some bullshit!
cut the crap missy.
i pass my gp so tt's the end of the line.
your job is done.
ok perhaps u din quite catch tt, your job is done! as in D-O-N-E!!
get it??
so i told her.
just tell them in wadeva way she like.
[i dun care]
my father is the one going.
it's not tt he doesnt care abt my studies.
he does but somehow i tink he noes tt i did try so he din push me harder.
unlike my mum.
she just dun understand.
the teachers dun understand either.
sometimes i just wan to break down in front of them to show them my displeasure but wad can i do??
i'm in sch...hello??!
***
so it's like there's no one i can reli confide into.
sorry pa for being so rude the other day.
it was late at night he ask me to slp early.
din ans him.
then he popped a random qn n asked how was i coping in sch?
he nvr showed such concern.
i was pissed abt hw tt day n not being able to slp early so i said," so wad if sch is tough?? wad can i do? i stil have to continue, it's not as if there's anyone to help me."
then my pa got pissed cos he asked out of concern n i was being reli rude.
i'm sorry.
i know tt he cares. =) thanks pa.
then on another day he told me tt i reli must study hard.
cos he said when he was young he didnt work hard n he ended getting sick of studying bcos he couldnt understand so he kinda gave up on his studies.
he told me to work hard n tt i shud try to understand my work so tt i wun have to work as hard as him to earn big bucks.
n it's not as if he's earning a lot.
i know he cares.
my mum cares too tt's y she keeps pressing me to go for tuition.
but now she doesnt cos she knows tt i din wan it.
ok i love my parents. aww...
they just wish tt i would work hard now so that i wun have to work as hard in future.
but i realise i'm reli brain-drained.
evryting just keeps coming in n going out. nthg stays.
***
no one to turn to.
no where to go.
cant possibly break down in front of my frens n tell them i hate sch the moment i c them rite??
tt wld b like lol.
if i reli do so.
i wld b crying evry single day.
i will try to work hard.
so ppl ard me,
PLEASE as in reli PLEASE if u r considering to confront me abt working hard in my studies.
please dun.
cos u r not me.
n u will definitely not noe wad i'm going thru.
thx for the concern anw. =)
[may God bless 06S304 to promote as a WHOLE class =D]
Wednesday, July 12, 2006
last sun i went for my 2nd time of math tuition.
definitely wasnt effective at all.
not cos of the tcher.
just tt i was stupid.
she taught differentiation.
all the rest of the students came either from hua chong or victoria.
they had already did tt topic in sch.
but i havent.
we did Maclaurin's Theory.
i kinda figure out wad it was but i din noe how to apply it.
the teach went pouring with mathematical formulas as though evry1 knew wad she was talking abt.
in fact evry1 did except me perhaps.
cos she looked at me.
i gave her the "sorry-but-i-reli-dun-understand" look.
so she went through the same qn for 3 times n i stil didnt get what she meant.
so i suppose it was just my deteriorating intelligence.
now tt my head is just an empty shell, i feel stupid.
incredibly dumb.
failed all my subjects except general paper.
tried gobbling down ginkgo pills which r known to improve memory but not intelligence.
din reli help so i stopped.
gave up hope.
tried talking my mum out from pushing me to math tuition.
it was a waste of her money n my time.
during the last session, evry1 was on differentiation.
the teach saw tt i hadnt got a clue abt tt topic so she gave induction tutorial instead.
but i knew nuts abt induction so i asked if i cld have summation instead.
i ended doing 2 n a half qn of summation during 3hrs cos i suck at tt too.
=.=
tt was like so lame.
well, eventually i kinda persuaded my mum to not let me go for tt tuition cos i kept grumbling abt how bad it was.
n she made up her mind to hire a private tutor instead.
thanks mum...
i know u meant well but no thanks.
i'm too bz for tuition.
even sacrificing 1hr for tuition is a great deal to me cos i noe my own limits and tis will definitely not help.
***
went through a lot of bad things today.
1. my grandma got admitted into the hospital becos she slipped and fell at hm n she was going to be operated on tonight at 10.30pm bcos there was something wrg w her knee when she fell. i felt so unfilial cos i had to stay in sch for cca n pw and was unable to visit her today. knew only abt the operation only today when my mum came back. if i had known tt it was so serious i wldnt have cared abt pw n cca and sld have gone to visit her today.
2. then at metta(cca) it was no better. waste my time trying to teach those kids. a girl just kept asking for answers she din even bother to think. she kept complaining p2 math was hard. (com'on!! wad abt j1 math??!) then the students there had reli poor academic results. i was v nice at first n i was teaching w a smile. then tt particular girl came along w her never-ending pursuit for math answers reli irks me. then i raised my voice at her. i din scold her. just tt i got pissed. got reli moody in sch today.
3. at sch, it was the same, i felt dumb during evry lecture. i was such a failure. n i had to hand in eom by tml which i had no idea wad to do. the sample was a lousy 1 or it is just tt i became too stupid to even understand simple instructions.
4. i tink i m suffering from a mental breakdown. evrytime my mum raises the issue of hiring a tutor, i wld first complain abt not having time n i wld end up in tears. i duno y. perhaps tuition was a sign tt my mum was at her wit's ends abt my results n have no choice but to get someone to "enlighten" me. just had a tiff w my mum over the tuition issue n at tis point of time i m tearing.
i get v upset when it comes to concern w my studies.
i have no time
n ppl suggest tt i sld plan my work n have time-management.
but the problem here is that i have no time in the 1st place so how was i to manage it??
answers anybody??
sigh.
***
Lord
i pray that i wun ever hate studying.
i pray that i will never hate studying.
i pray that i will come to love to study one day.
i pray that i will never want to give up on studying.
i pray that my grandma will get well soon.
Thank You in the name of Jesus i pray.
Amen.
***
I'm desperate. I reli am.
definitely wasnt effective at all.
not cos of the tcher.
just tt i was stupid.
she taught differentiation.
all the rest of the students came either from hua chong or victoria.
they had already did tt topic in sch.
but i havent.
we did Maclaurin's Theory.
i kinda figure out wad it was but i din noe how to apply it.
the teach went pouring with mathematical formulas as though evry1 knew wad she was talking abt.
in fact evry1 did except me perhaps.
cos she looked at me.
i gave her the "sorry-but-i-reli-dun-understand" look.
so she went through the same qn for 3 times n i stil didnt get what she meant.
so i suppose it was just my deteriorating intelligence.
now tt my head is just an empty shell, i feel stupid.
incredibly dumb.
failed all my subjects except general paper.
tried gobbling down ginkgo pills which r known to improve memory but not intelligence.
din reli help so i stopped.
gave up hope.
tried talking my mum out from pushing me to math tuition.
it was a waste of her money n my time.
during the last session, evry1 was on differentiation.
the teach saw tt i hadnt got a clue abt tt topic so she gave induction tutorial instead.
but i knew nuts abt induction so i asked if i cld have summation instead.
i ended doing 2 n a half qn of summation during 3hrs cos i suck at tt too.
=.=
tt was like so lame.
well, eventually i kinda persuaded my mum to not let me go for tt tuition cos i kept grumbling abt how bad it was.
n she made up her mind to hire a private tutor instead.
thanks mum...
i know u meant well but no thanks.
i'm too bz for tuition.
even sacrificing 1hr for tuition is a great deal to me cos i noe my own limits and tis will definitely not help.
***
went through a lot of bad things today.
1. my grandma got admitted into the hospital becos she slipped and fell at hm n she was going to be operated on tonight at 10.30pm bcos there was something wrg w her knee when she fell. i felt so unfilial cos i had to stay in sch for cca n pw and was unable to visit her today. knew only abt the operation only today when my mum came back. if i had known tt it was so serious i wldnt have cared abt pw n cca and sld have gone to visit her today.
2. then at metta(cca) it was no better. waste my time trying to teach those kids. a girl just kept asking for answers she din even bother to think. she kept complaining p2 math was hard. (com'on!! wad abt j1 math??!) then the students there had reli poor academic results. i was v nice at first n i was teaching w a smile. then tt particular girl came along w her never-ending pursuit for math answers reli irks me. then i raised my voice at her. i din scold her. just tt i got pissed. got reli moody in sch today.
3. at sch, it was the same, i felt dumb during evry lecture. i was such a failure. n i had to hand in eom by tml which i had no idea wad to do. the sample was a lousy 1 or it is just tt i became too stupid to even understand simple instructions.
4. i tink i m suffering from a mental breakdown. evrytime my mum raises the issue of hiring a tutor, i wld first complain abt not having time n i wld end up in tears. i duno y. perhaps tuition was a sign tt my mum was at her wit's ends abt my results n have no choice but to get someone to "enlighten" me. just had a tiff w my mum over the tuition issue n at tis point of time i m tearing.
i get v upset when it comes to concern w my studies.
i have no time
n ppl suggest tt i sld plan my work n have time-management.
but the problem here is that i have no time in the 1st place so how was i to manage it??
answers anybody??
sigh.
***
Lord
i pray that i wun ever hate studying.
i pray that i will never hate studying.
i pray that i will come to love to study one day.
i pray that i will never want to give up on studying.
i pray that my grandma will get well soon.
Thank You in the name of Jesus i pray.
Amen.
***
I'm desperate. I reli am.
Tuesday, July 4, 2006
omg omg omg
i typed out evrything n my com just died on me.
there was an error report n my window was closed.
n all tt i have typed just now is no longer there.
o.O
nvm.
i shall b patient n re-type evrything agn.
***
it was such a packed day today.
but it was so fun =)
slept at 4am last night to complete the YRF(yellow ribbon fund) proposal
but i din manage to finish it anyway.
i thot it was best if i get some shut-eye
if not i will definitely b dozing off in the movie the nxt day.
woke up at 8.30am tis morn.
i was meeting up with jiaxian at plaza sing.
the silly girl woke up early to buy her mp3
=.=
(limited to only 20pieces per day)
no cute guys there for admiration though but jx was so mesmerised but this girl working at the shop w a short cute haircut.
[ok!!...admit it jx! u lesbo!! lol =D]
there was a need for me to go to the creative shop
becos i had to buy new stik-ons for my zen neon.
yea...i got the bold series. they were nice.
but jx thot tt the kawaii series were better but nah.
craps my style. lol
[not tt i have any to speak of in the first place]
aft the retail therapy we went to mac.
[a hunger pang hit jx]
then jx realise tt she had lost her wallet.
btw jx had lost her wallet n she went to collect it b4 coming to buy her mp3.
so it was like, she found it n now she loses it agn.
we went searching in evry single place from the shop where her wallet was last seen to mac which was our last stop.
but we cldn't find it.
we were suppose to meet ser at 11am for a swim at karen's hse.
i was abt to msg ser to tell her tt we will b late becos our dear jx had lost her wallet when jx suddenly exclaimed that she had found it.
no more frantic girl.
but guess wad??!
"where did she find it?" u ask?
well...our v blur girl actually placed her wallet into a most secluded compartment of her bag which she has nvr used.
n today she just happens to misplaced her wallet in her bag.
O.O
ironic.
then aft suppressing the urge to conk jx' head,
we set off to meet ser.
***
when we reached karen's hse.
the security guard didn't want to let us in.
he was v rude to us.
[com'on, it's not as if i will b robbing hse to hse]
so i called karen to come out to fetch us.
i shouted over the phone,"Hey Karen!! We reached already. The security guard dun wan to let us in!!"
sorry but i was being v ap.
the security guard heard me of cos.
n when he saw karen coming out, he talked to her for a moment b4 coming over to us n apologised.
lol. [wicked laughter]
so when he let us enter, we thanked him.
n he gave us a very sincere reply,"Welcome!"
haha..spastic.
jx n karen cldn't swim due to unforseen circumstances which i shall not further elaborate.
so there was only me n ser left.
went for a dip in the pool.
splash! cooling chlorinated water. =)
went to the sauna as well. lol.
hot!
then at 1.30pm i went to shower.
after tt ser n i went to simpang bedok eat prata.
smiles. i had plain n egg.
ser had plain n banana.
we had teh-ice. a big cup of it.
it was a relatively satisfying lunch.
despite the fact tt i was alr running late for the meeting w shuning, chenen, xiuxian, jiaqi n kian hwee, ser n i walked hm.
i went hm to change b4 meeting them.
i was suppose to meet them at 3pm but i reached at 4pm instead. lolz.
***
aft i met up w them we went to buy movie tickets.
we were gonna watch 'just my luck' at first
but then we realised the time was not right.
so we watched 'superman returns' at 5.30pm
yea!! SUPERMAN! shuai.
the only cute guy i had seen over the past week.
wahaha.
the movie was not bad.
out of 5 stars i give it 3.5-4stars
[good enough already, wld have given it only 3.0stars if not for the cute guy tt acted as superman. lol]
then we had dinner at yoshinoya.
it was a crazy day out w those guys.
wee...
***
that's abt the whole of my day.
btw big accomplishment today!!
i have completed the YRF proposal at last!
yay. phew...
[dead beat]
zZZzz...
i typed out evrything n my com just died on me.
there was an error report n my window was closed.
n all tt i have typed just now is no longer there.
o.O
nvm.
i shall b patient n re-type evrything agn.
***
it was such a packed day today.
but it was so fun =)
slept at 4am last night to complete the YRF(yellow ribbon fund) proposal
but i din manage to finish it anyway.
i thot it was best if i get some shut-eye
if not i will definitely b dozing off in the movie the nxt day.
woke up at 8.30am tis morn.
i was meeting up with jiaxian at plaza sing.
the silly girl woke up early to buy her mp3
=.=
(limited to only 20pieces per day)
no cute guys there for admiration though but jx was so mesmerised but this girl working at the shop w a short cute haircut.
[ok!!...admit it jx! u lesbo!! lol =D]
there was a need for me to go to the creative shop
becos i had to buy new stik-ons for my zen neon.
yea...i got the bold series. they were nice.
but jx thot tt the kawaii series were better but nah.
craps my style. lol
[not tt i have any to speak of in the first place]
aft the retail therapy we went to mac.
[a hunger pang hit jx]
then jx realise tt she had lost her wallet.
btw jx had lost her wallet n she went to collect it b4 coming to buy her mp3.
so it was like, she found it n now she loses it agn.
we went searching in evry single place from the shop where her wallet was last seen to mac which was our last stop.
but we cldn't find it.
we were suppose to meet ser at 11am for a swim at karen's hse.
i was abt to msg ser to tell her tt we will b late becos our dear jx had lost her wallet when jx suddenly exclaimed that she had found it.
no more frantic girl.
but guess wad??!
"where did she find it?" u ask?
well...our v blur girl actually placed her wallet into a most secluded compartment of her bag which she has nvr used.
n today she just happens to misplaced her wallet in her bag.
O.O
ironic.
then aft suppressing the urge to conk jx' head,
we set off to meet ser.
***
when we reached karen's hse.
the security guard didn't want to let us in.
he was v rude to us.
[com'on, it's not as if i will b robbing hse to hse]
so i called karen to come out to fetch us.
i shouted over the phone,"Hey Karen!! We reached already. The security guard dun wan to let us in!!"
sorry but i was being v ap.
the security guard heard me of cos.
n when he saw karen coming out, he talked to her for a moment b4 coming over to us n apologised.
lol. [wicked laughter]
so when he let us enter, we thanked him.
n he gave us a very sincere reply,"Welcome!"
haha..spastic.
jx n karen cldn't swim due to unforseen circumstances which i shall not further elaborate.
so there was only me n ser left.
went for a dip in the pool.
splash! cooling chlorinated water. =)
went to the sauna as well. lol.
hot!
then at 1.30pm i went to shower.
after tt ser n i went to simpang bedok eat prata.
smiles. i had plain n egg.
ser had plain n banana.
we had teh-ice. a big cup of it.
it was a relatively satisfying lunch.
despite the fact tt i was alr running late for the meeting w shuning, chenen, xiuxian, jiaqi n kian hwee, ser n i walked hm.
i went hm to change b4 meeting them.
i was suppose to meet them at 3pm but i reached at 4pm instead. lolz.
***
aft i met up w them we went to buy movie tickets.
we were gonna watch 'just my luck' at first
but then we realised the time was not right.
so we watched 'superman returns' at 5.30pm
yea!! SUPERMAN! shuai.
the only cute guy i had seen over the past week.
wahaha.
the movie was not bad.
out of 5 stars i give it 3.5-4stars
[good enough already, wld have given it only 3.0stars if not for the cute guy tt acted as superman. lol]
then we had dinner at yoshinoya.
it was a crazy day out w those guys.
wee...
***
that's abt the whole of my day.
btw big accomplishment today!!
i have completed the YRF proposal at last!
yay. phew...
[dead beat]
zZZzz...
Sunday, July 2, 2006
exams were a total disaster.
horrid experience.
it was the first time ever tt i could ever not noe anything n enter the examination room with such ease.
the worst was math, i suppose.
so i ended up in a math tuition.
forced by my mum, had a deal w her.
went for it the first time 2day.
[thumbs down. down down down.]
first of all the teacher looks strange.
it was told that she used to be the vice-pres of tjc.
[yeah rite. but then agn hu noes?]
[shrugs]
then her hand-writing was atrocious.
her writing slants n she writes her 'k' in the strangest way.
wadeva.
we went thru p&c 2day.
[p&c=permutation & combination]
actually we were suppose to go thru differentiation but then my sch had yet went thru it yet.
so she decided not to.
but it seems lyk evry1 was at a different pace so she decides to start off w p&c.
it was ok.
i manage to follow wad she was saying.
i kept msging in class.
[not tt i m a rude girl or anything, but i just wanted to show my displeasure towards her]
[in other words, i was being a-p]
the tuition fees werent cheap.
$160 for four times. 2hrs per session.
from 1.30 to 3.30
the passing minutes were torturing me.
i was alr counting down at the start of the lesson.
so when it reached 3.30,
i started packing secretly n slowly
[hoping tt by the time i finish packing the teacher would let us go]
but Nooo...she went on & on & on.
we had to complete tis piece of work.
12 p&c qns.
there were stil 5 left when it was 3.30
so i thot lyk it was gonna b hw.
but no we had to complete it at the spot.
so i pressed on.
the super enthu teacher released us only at 4.30
=.=
so tt was all for the day n it was deemed that she had finished teaching p&c.
some lesson...
no cute guys. lol
[sorry out of point]
there were 2 guys n 3 girls including me, n 1 old lady
==>the teach.
boring...
wad a FRUITFUL day!! :)
[spastic]
***
p.s (looking forward to going out tml. wee..."just my luck" here i come...)
horrid experience.
it was the first time ever tt i could ever not noe anything n enter the examination room with such ease.
the worst was math, i suppose.
so i ended up in a math tuition.
forced by my mum, had a deal w her.
went for it the first time 2day.
[thumbs down. down down down.]
first of all the teacher looks strange.
it was told that she used to be the vice-pres of tjc.
[yeah rite. but then agn hu noes?]
[shrugs]
then her hand-writing was atrocious.
her writing slants n she writes her 'k' in the strangest way.
wadeva.
we went thru p&c 2day.
[p&c=permutation & combination]
actually we were suppose to go thru differentiation but then my sch had yet went thru it yet.
so she decided not to.
but it seems lyk evry1 was at a different pace so she decides to start off w p&c.
it was ok.
i manage to follow wad she was saying.
i kept msging in class.
[not tt i m a rude girl or anything, but i just wanted to show my displeasure towards her]
[in other words, i was being a-p]
the tuition fees werent cheap.
$160 for four times. 2hrs per session.
from 1.30 to 3.30
the passing minutes were torturing me.
i was alr counting down at the start of the lesson.
so when it reached 3.30,
i started packing secretly n slowly
[hoping tt by the time i finish packing the teacher would let us go]
but Nooo...she went on & on & on.
we had to complete tis piece of work.
12 p&c qns.
there were stil 5 left when it was 3.30
so i thot lyk it was gonna b hw.
but no we had to complete it at the spot.
so i pressed on.
the super enthu teacher released us only at 4.30
=.=
so tt was all for the day n it was deemed that she had finished teaching p&c.
some lesson...
no cute guys. lol
[sorry out of point]
there were 2 guys n 3 girls including me, n 1 old lady
==>the teach.
boring...
wad a FRUITFUL day!! :)
[spastic]
***
p.s (looking forward to going out tml. wee..."just my luck" here i come...)
Tuesday, June 13, 2006
lol came to blog agn.
2nd time of the day.
cos i rmb something v hilarious.
i just cannot not blog abt it. =D
2dae me n xian were going ahs then met ser at my hse downstairs.
but ser suddenly say she cant go cos her pa not feeling well.
so she had to stay at hm to look aft her pa
[filial child...aww...]
but xian need to get a photo album from her so we decided to give a suprise visit.
hehe
but i realise our class list din had hse address on it so we bo bian had to go search for ser hse.
i knew she lived on the 13th storey near lift C
[sorry ser, i blurt out ur add. haha]
so xian n i went up to the 13th storey
[her hse lift only stop at 6, 10 n 14 storey]
when the lift door open on the 14th storey, there was a flight of stairs in front of us
so we went straight down tt stairs
we thot it was now a matter of the right side of the flat or the left 1.
i even open up ppl's shoe cupboard to find ser significant black n yellow adidas shoes.
[but dun have leh]
so we thot it might b the other 1 so we called ser to ask her to open her door.
we waited.
n waited.
but the doors on both sides were still locked shut.
so we called ser agn to ask if she had opened her door.
she said she did n nobody was outside.
so xian n i walked up agn n walked along the corridors n went down another flight of stairs.
we called ser agn to ask for her door number but she din want to give us.
=.=
[fast forward]
we ended up walking to the wrg doorstep twice b4 finding where ser lived.
when she opened the door her hair was in a mess.
lol
so funny can??
we went in n slack at her hse for a very very long time b4 going back to ahs.
at abt 4pm plus then we left her hse for ahs.
AHS here we come...!!
2nd time of the day.
cos i rmb something v hilarious.
i just cannot not blog abt it. =D
2dae me n xian were going ahs then met ser at my hse downstairs.
but ser suddenly say she cant go cos her pa not feeling well.
so she had to stay at hm to look aft her pa
[filial child...aww...]
but xian need to get a photo album from her so we decided to give a suprise visit.
hehe
but i realise our class list din had hse address on it so we bo bian had to go search for ser hse.
i knew she lived on the 13th storey near lift C
[sorry ser, i blurt out ur add. haha]
so xian n i went up to the 13th storey
[her hse lift only stop at 6, 10 n 14 storey]
when the lift door open on the 14th storey, there was a flight of stairs in front of us
so we went straight down tt stairs
we thot it was now a matter of the right side of the flat or the left 1.
i even open up ppl's shoe cupboard to find ser significant black n yellow adidas shoes.
[but dun have leh]
so we thot it might b the other 1 so we called ser to ask her to open her door.
we waited.
n waited.
but the doors on both sides were still locked shut.
so we called ser agn to ask if she had opened her door.
she said she did n nobody was outside.
so xian n i walked up agn n walked along the corridors n went down another flight of stairs.
we called ser agn to ask for her door number but she din want to give us.
=.=
[fast forward]
we ended up walking to the wrg doorstep twice b4 finding where ser lived.
when she opened the door her hair was in a mess.
lol
so funny can??
we went in n slack at her hse for a very very long time b4 going back to ahs.
at abt 4pm plus then we left her hse for ahs.
AHS here we come...!!
at last...
went back ahs today to take my grad cert.
ser n jiaxian oso went back to take a look at the guitar camp.
karen came too.
she came to pass me bio notes.
was hoping that the ahs bookshop was open
so i could photocopy the notes but sadly no.
ser n xian went back becos the guitar juniors needed station masters.
but the 4 of us just went to take pictures at the fitness corner.
lol.
so fun la.
haha.
evrybody was so high.
took loads of pics then went to see how their junoirs carried out their activities.
after that we went to slack at the guitar room.
karen n i were free loaders.
we just sat there n started munching on the tidbits.
at abt 7pm we left n went hm.
[exciting day but i'm too tired to describe evry single detail tt happen =p]
p.s(btw xian did something tt totally made me ser n karen laugh lyk crazy ;D)
=>sorry la too lazy to type le. bb
went back ahs today to take my grad cert.
ser n jiaxian oso went back to take a look at the guitar camp.
karen came too.
she came to pass me bio notes.
was hoping that the ahs bookshop was open
so i could photocopy the notes but sadly no.
ser n xian went back becos the guitar juniors needed station masters.
but the 4 of us just went to take pictures at the fitness corner.
lol.
so fun la.
haha.
evrybody was so high.
took loads of pics then went to see how their junoirs carried out their activities.
after that we went to slack at the guitar room.
karen n i were free loaders.
we just sat there n started munching on the tidbits.
at abt 7pm we left n went hm.
[exciting day but i'm too tired to describe evry single detail tt happen =p]
p.s(btw xian did something tt totally made me ser n karen laugh lyk crazy ;D)
=>sorry la too lazy to type le. bb
Friday, June 9, 2006
haben start studying yet.
exams r only 2 weeks away.
my mum has been nagging.
got v irritated.
com'on...
it's not as if i dun care, i m more anxious abt mye more than her k?!!
got me so fed up.
duno where to start cos evryting sux.
dun understand evryting.
went airport w ser 2dae.
then sn came later, w sw. ;)
then i tried doing chem hols assignment.
woah.
[pat on my shoulder]
i did ONLY 2 qns??!
lol.
sn was screaming that she was hungry.
then they wanted to leave so we left the airport for tm.
[the usual haunt]
then we went pasta mania.
ser assured me that we will study but later.
then sn became v sick so we send her to the interchange sees that she boards the bus.
after that we went to shop for ser's earrings.
went montip then she din reli c anyting that she particularly like
so we went best denki to get earphones for my mp3.
then we went aries.
nope nthg that ser wanted.
so we back to montip,
ser got a pair of earrings n we bought some other stuff as well.
ha.
short entry.
v vague.
*yawnz
v tired.
still gotta mug??
eww...
wadeva.
bye.
exams r only 2 weeks away.
my mum has been nagging.
got v irritated.
com'on...
it's not as if i dun care, i m more anxious abt mye more than her k?!!
got me so fed up.
duno where to start cos evryting sux.
dun understand evryting.
went airport w ser 2dae.
then sn came later, w sw. ;)
then i tried doing chem hols assignment.
woah.
[pat on my shoulder]
i did ONLY 2 qns??!
lol.
sn was screaming that she was hungry.
then they wanted to leave so we left the airport for tm.
[the usual haunt]
then we went pasta mania.
ser assured me that we will study but later.
then sn became v sick so we send her to the interchange sees that she boards the bus.
after that we went to shop for ser's earrings.
went montip then she din reli c anyting that she particularly like
so we went best denki to get earphones for my mp3.
then we went aries.
nope nthg that ser wanted.
so we back to montip,
ser got a pair of earrings n we bought some other stuff as well.
ha.
short entry.
v vague.
*yawnz
v tired.
still gotta mug??
eww...
wadeva.
bye.
Tuesday, June 6, 2006
yea...
i got my bigger pencil case
n my shoebag.
[actually looks more like a super oversized pencil case]
after the long search for my shoebag...
it was neither a converse nor adidas nor nike.
it's myuk from the wallet shop.
hmm...
nvm.
i m 1 happy girl. =)
went out shopping w ning, linfeng n lf's fren.
then ning wanted to buy a bag n clothes.
we went ard the whole of bugis n she only managed to get herself a nike bag
also from the wallet shop.
she wanted the pink rooster bag.
but it was the last piece on the shelf.
so was the nike bag that she bought.
but the rooster bag looks rather dirty so she decided to get the nike bag instead.
it was not bad. cost her:$57.95
i tink. it was near 60bucks.
but she's happy anw. (=
i'm happy too.
i shud b studying rite now.
where's karen??!
she said she wanted to come over my hse.
hey...bluff me.[sobs]
nvm. shall mug on my own.
wahaha karen's bio notes stil w me.
hehe...;p
i got my bigger pencil case
n my shoebag.
[actually looks more like a super oversized pencil case]
after the long search for my shoebag...
it was neither a converse nor adidas nor nike.
it's myuk from the wallet shop.
hmm...
nvm.
i m 1 happy girl. =)
went out shopping w ning, linfeng n lf's fren.
then ning wanted to buy a bag n clothes.
we went ard the whole of bugis n she only managed to get herself a nike bag
also from the wallet shop.
she wanted the pink rooster bag.
but it was the last piece on the shelf.
so was the nike bag that she bought.
but the rooster bag looks rather dirty so she decided to get the nike bag instead.
it was not bad. cost her:$57.95
i tink. it was near 60bucks.
but she's happy anw. (=
i'm happy too.
i shud b studying rite now.
where's karen??!
she said she wanted to come over my hse.
hey...bluff me.[sobs]
nvm. shall mug on my own.
wahaha karen's bio notes stil w me.
hehe...;p
Sunday, June 4, 2006
wee...
at last i've finish the gpp.
hope our teacher accepts it.
[well he shud cos there's no time to re-do another one]
hehex.
my hands are now like trembling.
from all the typing.
have been using the com for more than 10hrs.
lunched on tidbits.
n now my dinner is equally pathetic.
have golden kiwis and strawberries.
lol
went to bedok central ntuc on sat.
must have been the fruit season.
nvr see so much fruits in a single place before.
haha...
[sua-ku]
then i bought strawberries n golden kiwis.
the ironic thing is that on the strawberries they put"sweet"
and is not as if nobody noes that
it is a fact that strawberries aren't totally sweet.
but when there's loads of strawberries put tgd, it sure smell good.
so i bought 1 box. hehe.
then bought 5 golden kiwis!!
my favourite!!
actually the strawberries weren't exactly sweet. but it sure smells good.
haha.
love strawberries too.
[eating strawberries--a privilege enjoy by strictly females only] =)
***
then i wan to thank some ppl who reli helped a lot during the gpp.
they gave me a lot of support n although there are some words which might not b of great deal to them but meant a lot to me.
thx anw. =)
million thanks to ah tan.
she sae i dun like her but in fact i love her.
lol[sounds wrg]
[sounds more wrg esp when my dardar in camp]
wahaha.
cos she said over the email:
"erm.. i will be gg to my ah ma's hse today.. if god any prob or wna change the proposal den i help u do.. will be home at ard 2100.. ya.. hope those info will be of help ba.. n dun so stress le.. relax.. haa.. :) "
i was like so touched.
[sniff..sniff]
thx girl.
reli touched.
haha.
***
n not forgetting yanhong, yanzi n arjun for having to tolerate w my demanding n annoying personality. thx.
haha.
so emotional.
p.s(my family home liao!! yipee!!)
p.p.s(they come hm cos they wan to have dinner w me)
oh man...
today is a series of touching events.
[sobs.]
thanks to all...
[...no longer lonely]
[warmth]
=)
at last i've finish the gpp.
hope our teacher accepts it.
[well he shud cos there's no time to re-do another one]
hehex.
my hands are now like trembling.
from all the typing.
have been using the com for more than 10hrs.
lunched on tidbits.
n now my dinner is equally pathetic.
have golden kiwis and strawberries.
lol
went to bedok central ntuc on sat.
must have been the fruit season.
nvr see so much fruits in a single place before.
haha...
[sua-ku]
then i bought strawberries n golden kiwis.
the ironic thing is that on the strawberries they put"sweet"
and is not as if nobody noes that
it is a fact that strawberries aren't totally sweet.
but when there's loads of strawberries put tgd, it sure smell good.
so i bought 1 box. hehe.
then bought 5 golden kiwis!!
my favourite!!
actually the strawberries weren't exactly sweet. but it sure smells good.
haha.
love strawberries too.
[eating strawberries--a privilege enjoy by strictly females only] =)
***
then i wan to thank some ppl who reli helped a lot during the gpp.
they gave me a lot of support n although there are some words which might not b of great deal to them but meant a lot to me.
thx anw. =)
million thanks to ah tan.
she sae i dun like her but in fact i love her.
lol[sounds wrg]
[sounds more wrg esp when my dardar in camp]
wahaha.
cos she said over the email:
"erm.. i will be gg to my ah ma's hse today.. if god any prob or wna change the proposal den i help u do.. will be home at ard 2100.. ya.. hope those info will be of help ba.. n dun so stress le.. relax.. haa.. :) "
i was like so touched.
[sniff..sniff]
thx girl.
reli touched.
haha.
***
n not forgetting yanhong, yanzi n arjun for having to tolerate w my demanding n annoying personality. thx.
haha.
so emotional.
p.s(my family home liao!! yipee!!)
p.p.s(they come hm cos they wan to have dinner w me)
oh man...
today is a series of touching events.
[sobs.]
thanks to all...
[...no longer lonely]
[warmth]
=)
i'm worn out.
so very worn out.
i tried to do my best at first.
but then it all seem so unneccessary.
because the eventual result will still be the same.
nobody cares.
i tried to but it never seem to work.
so now i decided to slacken.
but external pressure pushes me on.
i don't like it this way.
sometimes i don't understand why is it that there are some things that i can sacrifice and others can't.
it's all the same.
to do well in one aspect u'll definitely have to sacrifice another.
that's the rule that applies to all of us.
it's a fact.
i've already sacrifice my school work, my results and most importantly, i've sacrificed time spent with my family.
[tears]
life has never been smooth-sailing eversince i stepped into the gates of Meridian
[why?]
feel so alone, so empty.
who is to understand what i'm feeling right now?
***
my family's waiting...
but now they wait no more.
they left me in this empty shell
to fend for myself,
i don't blame them.
i blame it on myself
for having taken on so many responsibilities.
why can't i be a normal kid?
i feel so alone.
this lonely figure that has overshadowed me.
i feel so helpless.
nobody there to lend a helping hand.
i feel so ignorant.
so naive, so childish for having let my tears rolled.
i feel...so neglected, so condemned
i feel so hated, not by others, but by myself.
[...screams...]
so very worn out.
i tried to do my best at first.
but then it all seem so unneccessary.
because the eventual result will still be the same.
nobody cares.
i tried to but it never seem to work.
so now i decided to slacken.
but external pressure pushes me on.
i don't like it this way.
sometimes i don't understand why is it that there are some things that i can sacrifice and others can't.
it's all the same.
to do well in one aspect u'll definitely have to sacrifice another.
that's the rule that applies to all of us.
it's a fact.
i've already sacrifice my school work, my results and most importantly, i've sacrificed time spent with my family.
[tears]
life has never been smooth-sailing eversince i stepped into the gates of Meridian
[why?]
feel so alone, so empty.
who is to understand what i'm feeling right now?
***
my family's waiting...
but now they wait no more.
they left me in this empty shell
to fend for myself,
i don't blame them.
i blame it on myself
for having taken on so many responsibilities.
why can't i be a normal kid?
i feel so alone.
this lonely figure that has overshadowed me.
i feel so helpless.
nobody there to lend a helping hand.
i feel so ignorant.
so naive, so childish for having let my tears rolled.
i feel...so neglected, so condemned
i feel so hated, not by others, but by myself.
[...screams...]
Saturday, June 3, 2006
[missing ser]
she in camp now.
dardar when u break camp?
karen coming my hse study u wana come?
come k?
i'll b waiting...
lol
***
went swimming w sus 2dae.
v long nvr c her le.
almost got 3 weeks.
nvr go swimming for ages.
we met up n went swimming 2dae.
suppose to meet at 10am
but both of us overslept.
lol
so met at 11am
then when we were in the pool,
it was so hot.
the sun was scorching.
a lot of ppl were sun-bathing.
2dae's morn sun was 1 of the hottest.
then she told me tt the sun at 8am is the healthiest.
cos all the sunlight get converted into vitaminD
n the sun btwn 11am to 2pm is the worst.
[we might get skin cancer]
=.=
anyway.
i love to get tan.
wee...
now i have rosy cheeks
n a burning sensation on my back.
lol
my skin will peel v soon.
wadeva.
[stil love my rosy cheeks]
lol
when the redness fades off my face will become v black.
haha.
[lame]
[going crazy]
she in camp now.
dardar when u break camp?
karen coming my hse study u wana come?
come k?
i'll b waiting...
lol
***
went swimming w sus 2dae.
v long nvr c her le.
almost got 3 weeks.
nvr go swimming for ages.
we met up n went swimming 2dae.
suppose to meet at 10am
but both of us overslept.
lol
so met at 11am
then when we were in the pool,
it was so hot.
the sun was scorching.
a lot of ppl were sun-bathing.
2dae's morn sun was 1 of the hottest.
then she told me tt the sun at 8am is the healthiest.
cos all the sunlight get converted into vitaminD
n the sun btwn 11am to 2pm is the worst.
[we might get skin cancer]
=.=
anyway.
i love to get tan.
wee...
now i have rosy cheeks
n a burning sensation on my back.
lol
my skin will peel v soon.
wadeva.
[stil love my rosy cheeks]
lol
when the redness fades off my face will become v black.
haha.
[lame]
[going crazy]
Tuesday, May 30, 2006
sianz.
it's the sch hols
n i still have sch.
y cant i just enjoy the whole my my hols peacefully??!
aft sch went out to luch w ning, ah tan, shiqi, larre n jk
ate pasta mania.
[no student discount tis time]
so ex. total bill:$9.70
ning say the baked rice v nice.
so i ordered baked rice.
tasted horrible.
tasted strange.
larre was like still telling me good food is worth waiting for.
cos the baked rice was taking so long.
end up the food came,
tasted...bleah.
evrybody tried
then only ning and ah tan say nice.
eeww...
then i kept putting powdered-cheese n chilli flakes
to cover the horrid taste.
then larre n shiqi kept laughing at me
cos they say i use more than half the bottle of cheese n chilli flakes.
i did not!!
i not the only 1 using mah.
then larre n shiqi gang up n bully me.
they good lor.
win le la.
stupid shiqi loosen the cap of the chilli flake bottle.
then after that she n larre kept asking me to put more chilli.
then i dumb dumb put more chilli.
wah...
the moment i turn the bottle over, the cap came off.
then the chilli flakes came pouring out.
dots la...
i kana shock la.
then ning oso shock dio.
jk, larre n shiqi laugh like siao.
they win le lor.
stupid larre kept laughing.
lame shit.
i feel dumb.
boos. lol.
shiqi kept apologising so i forgive her.
haha.
stupid larre.
[i said i was gonna scold u on my blog liao]
stupid, stupid, stupid.
***
tml is slc senior farewell.
so me, ah tan, ning went meixin hse do prezzie.
we bought boxes then put marshmallows inside.
bought strawberries that was freaking big.
but very very sweet. ^^
we bought choc n made strawberry in choc dip.
it was kind of a failure cos the eventual product quite ugly.
haha.
but it was v fun.
we were going wild in mx hse.
we melted the choc in water bath.
the choc kept drying out.
n it was so disgusting when the fats "disassociate" w the choc.
there was like so much fats.
the white choc looked like a lump of lard soaking in oil.
eek.
then the milk choc looked like brown muah-chee.
hahaha.
disgusting but fun.
ah tan was so motherly she kept wiping the floor.
but she kept ordering me ard like her maid la!!!
[bully me. sobs~]
lucky we manage to finish evryting by 7.30pm
hehex.
went hm w ah tan aft tt.
***
phew...lucky 2day no hw to do.
if not i sure pengz.
alr 2 days nvr slp properly le.
now is the time to slp all i wan.
cos tml i have to reach sch at 12noon only!
wahaha. lucky me.
^^
it's the sch hols
n i still have sch.
y cant i just enjoy the whole my my hols peacefully??!
aft sch went out to luch w ning, ah tan, shiqi, larre n jk
ate pasta mania.
[no student discount tis time]
so ex. total bill:$9.70
ning say the baked rice v nice.
so i ordered baked rice.
tasted horrible.
tasted strange.
larre was like still telling me good food is worth waiting for.
cos the baked rice was taking so long.
end up the food came,
tasted...bleah.
evrybody tried
then only ning and ah tan say nice.
eeww...
then i kept putting powdered-cheese n chilli flakes
to cover the horrid taste.
then larre n shiqi kept laughing at me
cos they say i use more than half the bottle of cheese n chilli flakes.
i did not!!
i not the only 1 using mah.
then larre n shiqi gang up n bully me.
they good lor.
win le la.
stupid shiqi loosen the cap of the chilli flake bottle.
then after that she n larre kept asking me to put more chilli.
then i dumb dumb put more chilli.
wah...
the moment i turn the bottle over, the cap came off.
then the chilli flakes came pouring out.
dots la...
i kana shock la.
then ning oso shock dio.
jk, larre n shiqi laugh like siao.
they win le lor.
stupid larre kept laughing.
lame shit.
i feel dumb.
boos. lol.
shiqi kept apologising so i forgive her.
haha.
stupid larre.
[i said i was gonna scold u on my blog liao]
stupid, stupid, stupid.
***
tml is slc senior farewell.
so me, ah tan, ning went meixin hse do prezzie.
we bought boxes then put marshmallows inside.
bought strawberries that was freaking big.
but very very sweet. ^^
we bought choc n made strawberry in choc dip.
it was kind of a failure cos the eventual product quite ugly.
haha.
but it was v fun.
we were going wild in mx hse.
we melted the choc in water bath.
the choc kept drying out.
n it was so disgusting when the fats "disassociate" w the choc.
there was like so much fats.
the white choc looked like a lump of lard soaking in oil.
eek.
then the milk choc looked like brown muah-chee.
hahaha.
disgusting but fun.
ah tan was so motherly she kept wiping the floor.
but she kept ordering me ard like her maid la!!!
[bully me. sobs~]
lucky we manage to finish evryting by 7.30pm
hehex.
went hm w ah tan aft tt.
***
phew...lucky 2day no hw to do.
if not i sure pengz.
alr 2 days nvr slp properly le.
now is the time to slp all i wan.
cos tml i have to reach sch at 12noon only!
wahaha. lucky me.
^^
had gp exam today.
super rock-sing.
was dozing off during paper2.
just cldn't concentrate on reading the passages.
lol
dun quite understand wad the qns were asking for.
but i did manage to crap up my ans.
[hope that i get them rite] ;p
then we went for our learning journey.
off to lau pa sat we go...
sure learnt alot. lol
surely de lor.
but i realise lau pa sat english name is 'festival market'
lol.
ah tan say v 'nan ting'
i thot it sounded horrid as well.
so orbit.
then i ordered ban mian for lunch.
so did cor n kar n liwen.
the bowl was freaking big.
n the mian was like so much.
cldn't finish it.
then off to esplanade we went.
the sun was scorching.
used an umbrella.
along the way we took some pics.
then we slack at esplanade,
there were alot of other classes as well.
watched some girls dancing n we started commenting.
it was not bad.
soon we left and it was time for x-men 3!! ^^
***
we walked to shaw tower at beach road.
it was a rather old building but the theatre sure is big.
but the seats were not as comfy.
it was kinda prickly.
[pricked my butt]
mr ng treated us to popcorn.
[eat til i wana vomit]
then we had loads of leftover so we gave it back to mr ng
which he da pau back hm. haha
the show was good but i tink x-men 2 was nice as well.
in fact all the x-men movies were good.
normally the series tend to get real lousy.
but this 1 was good.
[recommended movie of the month!! ^^]
later dardar, ah tan,cor,kar,pq,yanhong,ning,yuquan n jk
went bugis mac n eat.
din buy anything cos i stil feeling nauseous over the popcorn.
then we went hm.
[wanted to buy shoebag but cant find nice ones]
***
(on the mrt)
it was so packed.
no place to grab onto anything for support
but then there was no place to fall either.
[so squeezy]
then a big-sized guy boarded the train n stand behind me.
he stood v close.
then i felt something stiff n hard rubbing against my butt.
[totally freaked out]
lol but dun tink is his *toot*
then i kept moving towards shiqi n yanhong
he moved forward too.
o.O
there was like so much space behind la.
n he kept moving towards me.
his front was clinging onto my back.
felt v uneasy.
then after a few stops.
he shifted and stood behind yanhong.
yanhong freaked out too. lol
she used her slingbag as a barrier btwn her n that guy.
shiqi was a bit pissed by him cos he kept mvoing towards us.
we felt so squashed.
shiqi told him to move but he said he was alighting.
so there was nthg we cld do.
it was only when he got off the train then i feel safe.
haha
***
went hm w sermin-dardar as usual.
then we were arguing on which side to walk.
lol.
then i walked her hm 2day.
hehe.
chatted along the way.
then she said how come i not guy.
[com'on dar dun lidat la]
save some women's pride.
lol.
lubz ya lotss.
nite nite, sugar dreamz...
...zZzzZz...
super rock-sing.
was dozing off during paper2.
just cldn't concentrate on reading the passages.
lol
dun quite understand wad the qns were asking for.
but i did manage to crap up my ans.
[hope that i get them rite] ;p
then we went for our learning journey.
off to lau pa sat we go...
sure learnt alot. lol
surely de lor.
but i realise lau pa sat english name is 'festival market'
lol.
ah tan say v 'nan ting'
i thot it sounded horrid as well.
so orbit.
then i ordered ban mian for lunch.
so did cor n kar n liwen.
the bowl was freaking big.
n the mian was like so much.
cldn't finish it.
then off to esplanade we went.
the sun was scorching.
used an umbrella.
along the way we took some pics.
then we slack at esplanade,
there were alot of other classes as well.
watched some girls dancing n we started commenting.
it was not bad.
soon we left and it was time for x-men 3!! ^^
***
we walked to shaw tower at beach road.
it was a rather old building but the theatre sure is big.
but the seats were not as comfy.
it was kinda prickly.
[pricked my butt]
mr ng treated us to popcorn.
[eat til i wana vomit]
then we had loads of leftover so we gave it back to mr ng
which he da pau back hm. haha
the show was good but i tink x-men 2 was nice as well.
in fact all the x-men movies were good.
normally the series tend to get real lousy.
but this 1 was good.
[recommended movie of the month!! ^^]
later dardar, ah tan,cor,kar,pq,yanhong,ning,yuquan n jk
went bugis mac n eat.
din buy anything cos i stil feeling nauseous over the popcorn.
then we went hm.
[wanted to buy shoebag but cant find nice ones]
***
(on the mrt)
it was so packed.
no place to grab onto anything for support
but then there was no place to fall either.
[so squeezy]
then a big-sized guy boarded the train n stand behind me.
he stood v close.
then i felt something stiff n hard rubbing against my butt.
[totally freaked out]
lol but dun tink is his *toot*
then i kept moving towards shiqi n yanhong
he moved forward too.
o.O
there was like so much space behind la.
n he kept moving towards me.
his front was clinging onto my back.
felt v uneasy.
then after a few stops.
he shifted and stood behind yanhong.
yanhong freaked out too. lol
she used her slingbag as a barrier btwn her n that guy.
shiqi was a bit pissed by him cos he kept mvoing towards us.
we felt so squashed.
shiqi told him to move but he said he was alighting.
so there was nthg we cld do.
it was only when he got off the train then i feel safe.
haha
***
went hm w sermin-dardar as usual.
then we were arguing on which side to walk.
lol.
then i walked her hm 2day.
hehe.
chatted along the way.
then she said how come i not guy.
[com'on dar dun lidat la]
save some women's pride.
lol.
lubz ya lotss.
nite nite, sugar dreamz...
...zZzzZz...
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